My Journey with Thyroid Diseases

133.

2011-09-30T09:59:00.000-05:00

Okay it's Friday -finally!- are the weekends the hardest times for y'all? It is for me because that's when hubby and I go on our date and out with friends! It's also starting to slowly cool down PTL! What are some recipes y'all are excited to make to warm you up during cold times -Let's try to keep them Thyroid Diet approved haha!

132.

2011-09-20T08:48:00.000-05:00

HELLO HELLO!!!!! How is everyone doing? I'm doing pretttyyy dang good, if I do say so myself. I've lost a total of 5.2 pounds! Obviously this is slower than last year, BUT I'm taking it much slower also. I'm trying to prevent getting tired of eating healthy hahahaha. How did y'all do last week? Any questions? Any exciting discoveries? Are you all exercising, and if so what are you doing?

131.

2011-09-13T09:33:00.002-05:00

I'm sorry friends! My hubby and I have been very sick , and I was going to post yesterday on my lunch, but I ended up leaving for the day at lunch time and slept most the day. :( How did everyone do their first week? It's time for check ins! I lost 3.2 pounds last week! Very excited about the loss, how about the rest of you?

130.

2011-09-08T10:55:00.000-05:00

Hello friends! How are you doing on the Thyroid Diet?? Anything exciting to share?? I can tell I already feel so much better. I don't get sick when I eat like this which is a nice relief!

How about any recipes that you've fallen in love with? Let me know!

129.

2011-09-05T09:23:00.002-05:00

Today marks Day 1 of the Thyroid Diet!!!! Are you all ready?! Good luck to all of you, if you have any questions do not be afraid to ask! Don't forget we will be posting our weekly success every Monday on the Thyroid Diet facebook page or on my blog mollysthyroidjourney.blogspot.com If you haven't committed to doing the diet with us it's never too late! Even if we're a month or so in, we would love it if you joined us! We currently have 18 people that have committed and I'm so excited!

128.

2011-09-02T13:01:00.001-05:00

MEGAN LORRIE AND JENNY IT'S THYROID DIET TIME!

(BTW I would still be THRILLED if other people wanted to join in! It's never too late)

Okay I'm so excited to start on Monday, and it looks like with facebook and my blog we have a confirmed 13 people who are doing the diet and 5 still on the fence. (But we'll get them) ;)

Every Monday we'll all post our losses on here, if you want to just send your weight loss that's fine, if you want to send measurements that's great too!!!

And don't ever worry if you have a bad week, we all have them and we're all here for each other!

If you ever have any questions don't hesitate to ask and thank you all for joining in our the Thyroid Diet with me!

TAMMIE! I never heard back from you, were you wanting to do the diet with us?? I so hope so!

127.

2011-08-31T12:55:00.000-05:00

Okay friends!!! When I did the Thyroid Diet last year, I always had people asking me how to do the Thyroid Diet, what is the Thyroid Diet, and I don't want to buy the book so can you just tell me? I don't think anyone should do it exactly how I do it, because I like foods that you don't, or hate foods that you love. SO THIS IS STRAIGHT OUT OF THE THYROID DIET BOOK!!!!!!! THIS IS HOW YOU NEED TO DO THE DIET!!!! I figured I should put this up a little early so you guys can prepare before we start on Monday! Okay if you all have any questions please let me know! I'm so excited to start in 5 days! WOO HOOOOOO!!!! We also need more people to commit to the diet with our group! Come on friends!!!!

The Thyroid Diet

Mary J. Shomon

The Free Form Diet (There are 3 different Thyroid diets you can do, they barely differ from each other, but Free Form is the most common, so we'll all do it) :)

· Eat 3 meals a day

· Each meal should include 1-2 potions of lean protein

· Eat all the low-glycemic veggies you want, at least 6 servings a day

· 1-2 servings of low-glycemic fruit a day MAX

· A small serving of good fat with each meal and snack

· 1-2 snacks per day if needed (Don't eat after 8pm)

· Only have 1-2 small treats a week

· Drink 64 oz of water minimum each day

· Have a minimum of 25 grams of fiber a day

Women's Calorie Worksheet

655 + (9.6 x weight in kg) + (1.8 x height in cm) – (4.7 x age in years)

***Your weight in pounds, divided by 2.2 = Your weight in kilograms

***Your height in inches, multiplied by 2.54 = Your height in centimeters

Body Mass Index

A rough calculation is: Your weight in pounds / (height in inches squared) x 703.

· Healthy weight BMI = 18.5-25

· Overweight BMI = 26-30

· Obese BMI = 31-40

· Morbidly Obese BMI = Over 40

Setting Realistic Goals

Phase 1: Whatever BMI range you are in (Healthy, Overweight, Obese, Morbidly Obese) drop to the next lowest range

Phase 2: Drop again to the next lowest range

Phase 3: If you are already in the healthy range, get to where you are happy. If not, drop to the next lowest range.

**Continue to set small personal goals within each phase!

Low Glycemic Veggies:

Artichokes Asparagus Beans & Legumes Broccoli Brussels sprouts Cauliflower

Celery Cucumbers Eggplants Green Beans Green Peppers Lettuce

Mushrooms Spinach Tomatoes Zucchini

Higher Glycemic Veggies (Try to limit/avoid):

Beets Carrots Celery Root Corn Parsnips Peas

Red potatoes Rutabaga Sweet potatoes Turnips White potatoes Winter squash

Yams

Low Glycemic Fruits:

Apples Apricots Blackberries Blueberries Cantaloupes Cherries

Grapefruits Nectarines Peaches Plums Raspberries Strawberries

Higher Glycemic Fruits (Try to limit/avoid):

Bananas Clementines Grapes Honeydew Orange juice Oranges

Papayas Pineapples Raisins Tangerines Watermelon Dates, dried fruits

ONLY EAT ON OCCASION:

Plain cooked oatmeal Pita Bread Brown Rice Corn tortillas High-Fiber NSA cereal Peas

AVOID:

Bagels White flour bread Cakes Cold cereals Cookies Crackers Granola

Muffins Pretzels Refined flours Rice Rice cakes white sugar

Good Fats:

Avocados Canola Oil Cashews Olives Olive Oil Peanuts/Oil Peanut Butter

Almonds Corn Oil Fish Flaxseeds Mayonnaise Pecans Sesame Seeds

Sunflower Seeds Walnuts

Serving Size:

Veggies: ½ cup raw, chopped or cooked. ¾ cup juice. 1 cup raw leafy greens.

Starches: 1 slice of whole wheat bread. ½ slice of a whole wheat bagel. 2 cups of popcorn. ½ cup of whole grain cereal, pasta, brown rice, potatoes, corn.

Beef/Pork/Lamb: 3 oz

Fish: 5 oz

Poultry: 6 oz

Cheese: 1 oz (2 oz low-fat)

Egg: 2 eggs

Fats: 1 tbsp Oil or mayo. 5 lg olives, 7 sm olives. 1/8 medium sized avocado. 1 tsp Butter. 1 oz of nuts.

Fruits: 1 cup berries. 10 cherries. 1 small peach or apple. 1 medium plum or nectarines. ½ grapefruit.

Dairy Products: ½ cup lowfat milk. 1 cup fat-free or low-fat plain yogurt. ½ cup low fat ricotta or cottage cheese.

Things to do:

Eat spicy foods, drink more tea, snack on peanuts, add almonds, eat a big breakfast, eat three meals/day, eat a lighter dinner, eat slowly and chew thoroughly.

Things to cut back or eliminate:

Alcohol, caffeine, sugary soda/teas/juices, most sweeteners -except stevia-, multiple minimeals, don't eat after 8pm.

126.

2011-08-29T13:12:00.002-05:00

Alright alright! I'm going to be starting up the Thyroid Diet again a week from today, Monday 09-05-11, and I want at least 20 other people to join in! My boss has already agreed, can we get at least 19 more to do it with us?? Think of how fun and easy it will be with a bunch of people doing it with you. So who wants in?? Let me know!

125.

2011-08-25T20:14:00.000-05:00

Oh my goodness I can't believe it's been two weeks since I posted! I have just been going crazy over here. I never have time to do anything let alone get online :( How is everyone?? I've been pretty okay, battleing some kind of sickness which hasn't been extremely thrilling but that's life :) I don't have much time right now either but I REALLY REALLY wanted to share a song with y'all.

I was driving to work yesterday when they played it, and I just had tears streaming down my face. Now, she's kind of taking it in a breast cancer direction...but when you hear it you'll understand we can relate to it in some ways. As you all know I've had some scares in my life. When I was a baby the doctors told my parents I wouldn't make it through the night because I had the croupe so bad. (They now think I had such a bad case of it because I've probably always had thyroid problems) I had no oxygen in my body so they had to keep an IV taped to my head and were pumping me with steroids to open up my airways again. Obviously I lived through that night...but everyone was shocked. Then my Sophomore year of high school I got the news that I only had a short time before I went into a coma and eventually died because of how bad my thyroid was. And last just a couple years ago my doctor told me I had brain tumors. After my first day of uncontrollable crying I accepted it and was ready to defeat it...Two weeks later we got a call, turned out she was wrong and I didn't have tumors. PTL (Praise the Lord!)

Even just the call telling us we have a thyroid disease and/or cancer is incredibly hard to handle when you find out exactly what it all entails. Which is why I think this song is perfect for us all. I hope you'll all take a moment to listen in!

She dropped the phone and burst into tears

The doctor just confirmed her fears
Her husband held it in and held her tight
Cancer don’t discriminate or care if you’re just 38
With three kids who need you in their lives
He said, "I know that you’re afraid and I am, too
But you’ll never be alone, I promise you"

When you’re weak, I’ll be strong
When you let go, I’ll hold on
When you need to cry, I swear that I’ll be there to dry your eyes
When you feel lost and scared to death,
Like you can’t take one more step
Just take my hand, together we can do it
I’m gonna love you through it.
She made it through the surgery fine
They said they caught it just in time
But they had to take more than they planned
Now it's forced smiles and baggy shirts
To hide what the cancer took from her
But she just wants to feel like a woman again
She said, "I don't think I can do this anymore"
He took her in his arms and said "That's what my love is for"

When you’re weak, I’ll be strong
When you let go, I’ll hold on
When you need to cry, I swear that I’ll be there to dry your eyes
When you feel lost and scared to death,
Like you can’t take one more step
Just take my hand, together we can do it
I’m gonna love you through it.

And when this road gets too long
I'll be the rock you lean on
Just take my hand, together we can do it
I’m gonna love you through it.
I’m gonna love you through it.

124.

2011-08-12T18:42:00.000-05:00

Okay who is ready for what I'm about to say?

Well hopefully all of you....

ANYWAY I have a goal, I know I know, some of you that have been with me from the beginning remember I've set a few goals and not followed all the way through, due to whatever was going on in my life. BUT I really really really really want this and I want to do this for me for so many reasons. -I'll list reasons last

So once again we're going to California for Christmas to visit my family, which is what gave me the push to set goals once again and really go for it. First of all, I'm not doing this for my family...I am doing it for me. But what gave me the "push" was how I've been feeling lately...and the dreaded plane seats/safety belts. my husband doesn't mind of course if I pour into his seat as well, but I do and I see the stewardesses trying to see my seatbelt to see if I actually got it to buckle! It's like I imagine them with evil grins bringing me an extender! NNNOOOOOO!

My goal this time isn't to lose all my weight. And if I don't lose much weight that's fine, I do want to get to a size 18 though...I've been in the 20s since college and I'm ready to be in the teens again -I'm currently a 26...so 4 pant sizes! With getting to an 18, I would also like to lose 60 pounds in the next 4.5 months. So those are my goals, but like I said, the weight isn't the biggest issue, it's the size!

60 pounds in 4.5 months seems like a lot to me, but then I realized I lost almost 50 in 3 months my first time doing the Thyroid Diet, so I'm pretty confident I can put a dent in that :)

I am really ready to do T-Tapp again, my back is hurting again (for those that don't know, I have a degenerative disc in my lower back + muscle spasms = I literally have been paralized for hours before because of it....and it hurts ALL THE TIME, but this week is pretty intense) I'm hoping getting back into T-Tapp and the Primary Back Stretch that will get better though, and I feel really good Thyroid-wise today! I think I'm finally ready to start again! YAY! 4 weeks without it wasn't fun.

My reasons: The big one is my health, I know being this large is extremely unhealthy, and it terrifies me! I also lose a lot of self confidence when I'm overweight, and I want that back and I'm sure my hubby does too...err...let me explain that one! My husband loves me, no matter what size I am, and he will always think I'm beautiful. But I want to feel like I'm beautiful for him too, and so I lose a lot of confidence and it bothers him because he thinks I'm beautiful. I also feels like it hinders our relationship and I don't want anything to hinder that! I want to go shopping and not cringe at the thought of it, I want to enjoy going to buy clothes! And last, I want to get to a point where we feel I'm healthy enough to start trying to get pregnant again. So those are the reasons! I'm hoping I can remember those during this time!

One last thing for today....by request I have pictures for y'all!

Here is our new baby Zöe!! (One has her big sister Skylar in it too!)

Have a great weekend friends!

123.

2011-08-07T19:24:00.000-05:00

Hey dolls! oh my word I can't believe how long it has been since I posted. I honestly had no idea! Mine and Cory's lives have been SO SO BUSY since my last post. well.....all the time. but still. Okay so the day after my last post we got a new puppy for Skylar to play with! I honestly don't remember Skylar being this much hard work, I'm sure she was but Cory and I are exhausted parents that is FOR SURE! We seriously don't even get on the computer at home anymore. If we aren't taking out the new puppy, and trying to make sure she and Skylar are playing fair, we're trying to eat and get each other to work! (Cory's been working nights these last couple months...thankfully that's over though!) Then there have been BIG things going on at my new job, unfortunately I can't share, but I feel like this is the busiest I've been since I started there...so there really isn't any time to post while I'm there either. Anyway...just busy busy busy!

Okay I wish I had a super awesome T-Tapp report to give you but unfortunately I don't. and I promise I actually have a reason. A few weeks ago I noticed my perscription for my thyroid meds was getting low, but being me...I kept forgetting to refill it until the day I actually needed it -seriously I do this every time...yay for 1 hour refills!- But this time was bad...Cory and I went on our weekend date and I also went and got an amazing mani/pedi with my friend, not a big deal because I knew we would still have enough for my perscription (all our bills for the next two weeks were already paid) and to have some extra money for any misc. things we might need. Now in our house, I'm the one that keeps track of finances. It has nothing to do with my husband's ability of doing it...it's just that I LOVE figuring budgets and keeping track of money and all that, so I do it. I have a very good system down on the computer and it works perfectly. But I forgot one new thing. Paying our old apartment for carpet replacement. I wrote them a check and forgot all about it. Apparently it went through on Friday...and I didn't notice until Saturday afternoon -after our date, my nails, and also the day I no longer had any pills.- It literally left us with $5 to our name, we've never been in that tight of a spot financially and I flipped out because I forgot something like that. So I couldn't get my perscription until we got paid 6 days later, mistake #1.

I knew I should've just called one of our parents...but I didn't, mistake #2. and I didn't tell my hubby....mistake #3. He noticed Thursday night and got really upset. I don't blame him. With how high my perscription is...missing one day makes me feel awful, and he knows that. Thankfully we both got paid on Friday and I got my perscription refilled, and then went to get our new puppy...I was thinking all was fine.
I took it really easy that whole week just in case, but wasn't prepared for the next week -this last week-. I feel the worst I've felt in years. It's hard to go up the stairs, I can barely stay standing because I just feel so weak, and I'm so so tired. Basically normal Thyroid things, just magnified. Needless to say, my hubby my parent's, who now know, aren't thrilled with my week free of thyroid hormones. I scared them all and I'm sorry. Also, I haven't worked out since this started for obvious reasons....so it's been almost three weeks without T-Tapp :( I want to get back to it SO bad. I know my body will feel better when I do, but I need to wait until I know I'm okay to work out, and I can already tell I'm much better today than I was on Friday. So that's good news.

Anyway, I just wanted to let you all know what's been happening. I'm hoping I'm well enough to T-Tapp tomorrow, and I'll let you know how it's going soon.

BY THE WAY...I do not think it is wise for ANYONE to stop taking their Thyroid meds for any reason. I was really stupid that week I should have just asked one of our parents for the $20.

122.

2011-07-27T15:58:00.000-05:00

Hello friends! Sorry it's been a whole minute since I've posted last. My life has just been fully insane this last week and a half! So bad i haven't worked out the entire time. (So when I get home today I need to start for 4 days again!) I feel like as soon as I get to the every other day part of T-Tapp, so much stuff happens to the point where all I do when I get home is finally sleep. This is obviously not okay, so I'm going to attempt to wake up an hour early every day to get it done then. I know it's just an hour, but even the difference of half an hour seems like not enough sleep for me haha.

But good news, I ordered the Skin Tightening System from T-Tapp's website as well as the B-12 plus spray. (which really doesn't taste very good. If you get this stuff...be prepared to down it with water soon after) But I can already tell a major different from the spray and the fibrotox (I think that's it's name) I have more energy, and it's disgustingly obvious that I'm getting rid of all the toxins in my body. So once I start my T-Tapp again -which I seriously hope is tonight- I'm going to start the body brushing as well! I've met women whom have lost TONS of weight, and because of T-Tapp and the Skin Tightening System, don't have any loose skin! So I'll let you know how all of that goes!

Last thing, I came across a quote today from Audrey Hepburn. And when I first read it I laughed because it so sounded like everything I would say I decided I had to share it with y'all!

"I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day, and I believe in miracles."

I hope everyone can live like this <3

121.

2011-07-18T16:01:00.000-05:00

Hello everyone! Happy Monday I hope you are all doing well and enjoyed your weekends! Okay so as you all know I'm doing T-Tapp every other day, and I did it four days last week. I lost 2.5 inches last week but gained a pound. So that is now a total of 19.5 inches in 3 weeks! Love that!

Obviously it's been dropping almost in half every week but this week I think I know why. My hubby and I have been super stressed, we've had a lot of big things -not good things- that just keep popping up one right after another and we both have been so stressed out since last Monday. I know being stressed isn't good period, and it definitely doesn't help when you're trying to shed inches and weight but I've been finding it hard to not be stressed. It's so bad that I'm physically shaking even now as I type.

So anyway of course I'm not positive why it was much different but I would bet stress is a big factor!

Other than that T-Tapp is going great, it still kicks my butt absolutely every time but I can already tell a big difference in my knees and back! They really don't hurt nearly as bad and I feel like I can move more than I usually can!! So what's going on with you guys??

120.

2011-07-12T13:01:00.000-05:00

I feel like I've been posting a lot, and then I realized I hadn't since Thursday! WOOPS! First of all how is everyone? Good I hope! I'm doing pretty well, but I was having some serious pain issues at the end of last week.

Thursday I felt like I was getting sick or something and then Friday evening my entire body was in so much pain. Absolutely everywhere from the neck down was killing me and it definitely hindered my T-Tapp because I could barely go up and down our stairs or stay standing very long at the grocery store. 95% of my weekend was in bed without moving. I was thinking it was somehow Thyroid related because I know bone soreness can come from Thyroid problems and I'm almost positive I have fibromyalgia as well. BUT it felt like an everything pain, bones and muscles.

Anyway, on Monday it turned from shooting pains to achy so I went back to T-Tapping, since I missed so many days in a row (Thursday was my day off, then we all know how the weekend went) I've decided I'm going to do 4 in a row again to give me a little boost! I worked out Monday when I got home and it kicked my butt, but then I woke up early this morning and decided to get my T-Tapp done for the day and I had the BEST work out. It felt awesome and I could feel each individual muscle working, I just felt so in tune with my body that I'm pretty sure it's the best form I've ever had while T-Tapping.

Monday was 2 weeks being back with T-Tapp so I did all my measurements and weighed in, I only lost .2 pounds, but at least it's a loss and not a gain! Buuuuuuuttttt I did lose 5 inches last week :) :) I was pretty excited about that. So in the last two weeks I've lost 2.4 pounds and 17 inches off my body! WOO HOO!

I'm still getting used to T-Tapp and how it changes my appetite (i'm much more hungry, and I've been craving sweets, which I normally don't eat a lot of -I'm more of a salt and carb person-) but I feel like I'm beginning to get a hang on it so hopefully very soon I'll be ready to go back to the Thyroid Diet! Lose some pounds with those inches!!!! :)

Love you all, until next time!

119. (also post #5)

2011-07-07T20:01:00.001-05:00

This is the second and last "old" post that I'll be reposting. I am going to change some of the pictures...I have found some since I last posted this in April of 2010 that show my body a little bit better. So here we go:

Okay so I was thinking I might have a little post to see how I was gaining weight over the years. Now please keep in mind, some of these pictures are probably funny or whatever but I don't take a ton of serious pictures. Also not all of these you can see my whole body, but you can tell in my chest and face how much weight I'm gaining.

Picture 1: I was 140 pounds, and this shirt was two sizes too large. I am on the left of the picture this is my Sophomore year of High School

Picture 2: This was my Junior year of High School after my thyroid had been removed this was one of my proms and I am on the right, I weigh about 160 here.

Picture 3: The end of my Senior year I was 180 here, this is before one of my voice recitals

Picture 4: This is during my Freshman year of college, I'm the girl in the polka dot dress I weigh 200 lbs here, there was some dinner going on this night

Picture 5: Nearing the end of my Freshman year, I weighed right around 215-220, I guess we were doing a see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil thing?? Roommates Birthday dinner.

Picture 6: This is right after my Freshman year of college ended. We were getting ready to leave for Russia. I'm in the i <3 Clyde shirt, I weighed 230.

Picture 7: This is near the end of my Sophomore year of College. Back to 230, I went down to about 210 for a bit but I went back up. This is so you can see a close up of my face. This picture is funny we didn't take any serious pics this night, but it was the last night I remember feeling like I actually looked pretty.

Picture 8: This is three weeks later the day after I moved to Texas, with my hubbs I weigh 250 lbs.

Picture 9: This is my wedding day a couple months after the previous picture in August 2008 I weigh 280 lbs

Picture 10: This is a few months after the wedding, my family came to visit us in Texas, I am in the very middle, I weigh 300 lbs.

Picture 11: I'm in the middle, this is me at 323 pounds in March of 2010 during a Girls Weekend with my Mom and sisters.

So I hope these pictures help you see everything a little bit differently also. You can see, even in just my face, how much I have gained. My eyes aren't so big, now they look squinty. My dimples are disappearing :( And I just look flat out huge. I seriously can't wait to get back to somewhere between the second and third picture, and one day I WILL GET THERE

119. (also post #1)

2011-07-07T19:15:00.000-05:00

Okay this was actually my first post done April 11, 2010. Keep that in mind since some of these things have now changed in the little over a year since I wrote it. But I thought it needed to come up again for the newer people here! After this I would suggest you read # 116 since it was written just two weeks ago!

This blog is not meant to make people sad, have them feel sorry for me and it is not for attention. It is simply to let people understand what I am going through, and what has been happening throughout the last 10 years of my life. Also, I am reading a couple new books by Mary J. Shomon and through these books I am going to attempt (once again) to lose the weight that this disease has caused me. So this blog will also be my weekly (possibly daily) journey with this last resort diet; the "Thyroid Diet".

When I was in 7th grade I was diagnosed with Graves' Disease, and hyperthyroidism. (In case you were wondering you can have hyperthyroidism without Graves' Disease) That is when your thyroid (butterfly shaped gland that wraps around your trachea) is over active. Your thyroid controls almost everything that happens inside your body, like:

Heart Rate

Metabolism

Moods

Immune System

Menstrual Cycles

Sex drive

Brain Activity

Ability to get pregnant

Body Temp

Cholesterol

etc. etc. etc. (I think you get the point)

I'm not certain, since I have never done speed, but I'm guessing that's what your body feels like at all times; like you're on speed (sitting down relaxing my heart rate was going 150 bpm...yea...) So I was taking medication and during my Freshman year of High School I went into remission from the disease and all seemed great for a while. During my Sophomore year however I started feeling not so great again. We called the Doctor he said I was fine... so we just went along with it. At the end of the year we went back to the Doctor and I had relapsed. It was the worst I have ever been and we were told if we didn't do something soon I would slip into a vegetable like state and eventually die from that. We had my thyroid removed with radio active iodine and were told that with thyroid replacement medication I would be fine. Ha...Ha...Ha.... ;)

Up until that point I had always been rather thin, I was 5'8'' and weighed in around 140-145 lbs. I was very athletic, on soccer teams, club swimming and recreational swimming teams, volleyball, basketball...basically I was always busy with sports. It wasn't long after I had my thyroid removed that I started gaining weight. I got up to somewhere between 180 and 190 lbs by the end of my Senior year of High School. At the time we thought it might have something to do with my thyroid problems but we really just blamed it on me eating the same and not working out anymore. (I have hyper-elasticity in my joints...and because of that I blew all the ligaments out of my right shoulder, some in my left shoulder; and it was starting in my knees.) I was on thyroid replacement hormone but they couldn't find the right dose, I wasn't able to get to a "normal" level. It was very frustrating, but besides being a little overweight it wasn't interfering with my life so I didn't really care.

In the fall of 2006 I left home to go to Biola University La Mirada, CA. College was great but man...that Freshman 15...turned into a Freshman 50. I was gaining weight like crazy and I couldn't stop. In December of that year we did some more testing and found out I went to the complete opposite side of the thyroid problem; I was now Hypothyroid with Hashimoto's Disease. (Once again you can have the first without the other) I didn't just go to the under active side of things...I was WAY under active, which explained the weight gain. After we found this out my mom took me to a specialist in Beverly Hills to try to fix what was going on. Because he is pretty well known I won't mention his name...but he was the worst Doctor I have seen since this started. He accused me of not taking my medication, he said I was probably scarfing down soy products. (soy is incredibly bad for people with thyroid problems) I wasn't doing any of these things, this guy just thought he was so awesome, that me getting worse HAD to be my fault, not his. Needless to say I continued to get worse and worse over the next year and a half. I started doing horrible with my school work, mainly tests, because everything was so slowed down I couldn't concentrate, I couldn't remember things I had studied and one day I even forgot my name. It was terrifying I cried for hours. Soon enough all I wanted to do was sleep, and I was getting sick a lot. I didn't feel happy all the time like I usually did and just walking exhausted me. I didn't gain a lot more weight but when I finished my Sophomore year of College I weighed in at 250 lbs. ugh...

After that year I moved to Texas with my -then soon to be- husband Cory. I found another Doctor here, her name is Dr. Espinoza and she has been great so far...but I haven't been helped. I have continued to get worse and I have gained more and more weight. I moved to Texas in May of 2008 and by August 2008 I weighed 280 lbs for our wedding. I was disgusted with myself when I got our wedding pictures back I cried forever. Our wedding was beautiful and so much fun and the pictures were amazing...but who was this disgustingly overweight girl in the wedding dress?! That isn't what I look like, that's not what I feel like how can that possibly be me? But it was...and unfortunately that wasn't my top weight. We've had some scares in the last year and a half, they thought I had tumors...I've miscarried and the Doc said I would never be able to have children...and recently they said there was no more they could do for me. They would just keep trying to give me higher doses but that's all that could be done. A normal person with hypothyroidism takes their meds with a dose around 100mcg. I take 275mcg...and yet I'm still worse. But I'm not giving up hope, I refuse to believe that I will never carry a baby the full 9 months and have a normal baby, and although my Doctor has asked me over and over again to stop trying to diet and to just let the disease do what it will...I refuse to continue to be this overweight. Actually I'm not even overweight, I'm morbidly obese.

That's where this book by Mary J. Shoman comes in and the majority of the reason for this blog. I've tried tons of diets, Weight Watchers, Atkins, Insulin Resistant diets, cutting calories...you name it. On Average I eat 1500-1600 calories. Way less than most people eat in a day. I walk for 40-60 minutes every day...and when I'm able to I work out on the elliptical machine. Most days it's too hard though, I'm still so tired and exhausted and really all I want to do is never leave my bed. I don't though, I work, I spend time with my husband and puppy and friends. I don't want people to think I'm a depressed person who doesn't do anything with my life so I don't live that way. And I no longer want strangers to look at me and think I'm a couch potato that just sits there stuffing my face. It is incredibly difficult for someone with hypothyroidism to lose weight, the majority of us gain a lot of weight while we're trying to diet. So I'm going to try this one last diet and I will keep a blog on my journey during it. If you guys have any questions about anything please post it on my blogs I'll answer it. And now for the most embarrassing thing about all of this that most people do not know because they haven't seen me since I moved away....

My name is Molly, I'm 21 years old, I have had thyroid diseases for 10 years of my life and I have gained 183 lbs because of it. I am currently 323 lbs and I will, somehow, lose this weight.

118.

2011-07-07T18:59:00.000-05:00

Well hello there, so soon I know! But here I ammmmm :) If you couldn't tell I've truly missed you all! I want this blog to get back to where it started. Where people commented letting me know about what was going on in their lives and asked questions. Obviously it will still be about my journey with thyroid diseases in general, as well as the Thyroid Diet and T-Tapp

So what's going on? Hit me with what's going on!

I just got a beautiful message, actually from a family member, saying how much she loved reading my blog and how it helped her with what's going on with her even though our diseases are drastically different. And I realize I've been quite selfish to just leave you all. I did need time to heal from my third miscarriage and I thank you all for giving it to me but I shouldn't have just disappeared, I see that now. I want to be there for people. Up until a year ago, I never knew anyone else who had Thyroid problems like I did and I wish I had growing up. It would have been wonderful to know that other people were going through this as well and thought a lot like I did! I know how hard this disease can be, and it kills me to know there could be someone else who was in the same position I was my first 10 years of this disease. Alone.

I'm going to post a few more times right now. A couple of them are already on here, I believe they are #1 and 5 but since they were obviously so long ago and there are new people here I want them to be able to see the start of this blog. So forgive me for the oldies!

117.

2011-07-04T10:41:00.000-05:00

Happy Independence Day everyone! Today was day 8 of T-Tapping and it hurtttt. I accidently missed day 5 but have been going strong every day since. Day 6 was the easiest day by far, yesterday I had issues with keeping my form and today was just killer haha. But I'm glad I did it and it's done til tomorrow!

I had some hard times this last week, I could feel Satan just trying to get me to stop working out and go back into my dark place. This little kid I've seen almost every day for the last three months decides this was his week he was going to tell me I don't look good, I need to exercise and stop eating. I know he's 6, but it still hurts because I know he's right BUT I am doing something about it for the first time in a LONG time. As if to make it worse I broke a chair in front of 3 people the next day when I sat down. A few hours later the main diamond in my wedding ring fell out and I spent 2 hours looking for it! I did thankfully find it, but when my hubby and I went to the store they said they stopped trying to sell those types of rings because the diamonds don't stay in very well....(uhh...you think? This is the 3rd diamond that's fallen out in a little over a years time!) So they said they could fix it but I would need to know it would continue to happen. So they let us trade it in and I got a beautiful ring, but am still sad about my old one. :( By the time we finished that, got home and ate it was already 9pm and I was so mentally exhausted we went to bed then -that was the day I missed-.

But I told Satan he couldn't bother me and the next morning I was T-Tapping away! YAY! SOOOO before I worked out this morning I weighed myself and did all my measurments and I can't wait to tell you! I lost 2.2 pounds this week, which I'm actually pretty excited about because I'm not really dieting, and doing T-Tapp religiously has made me SO hungry. So I'm trying to get a perfect balance of eating a little more without stuffing my face at dinner haha. So any loss was really nice. But my measurements were THRILLING! In the last week I have lost a total of 12'' !!!!!! Quite proud of myself! Even when I'm tired I still T-Tapp, and I don't get discouraged when I have days where I need to stop a little more than usual; because it makes those days that I don't need to stop extra awesome.

Anyway I hope you guys have a wonderful day! I'll talk to you soon :)

P.S. is this okay? This once a week? It's very helpful for me but I was wondering if y'all think it's too little?

116.

2011-06-28T19:07:00.000-05:00

Hello dolls, I'm back...I'm hoping for good! So as you all know I've been having a hard time lately, I just have not been able to get past my third miscarriage that happened in February. I can control bursting into tears, but I'm not any farther than I was when it happened. So as for everything else, T-Tapp, and the Thyroid diet I have not been doing it. And that has to do with healing from the miscarriage. I just haven't gotten that thing in my head that says, "Yep! I'm ready to start again!" Until now...but I'm taking it slow, and I'll get to that in a minute. SO I need to tell you guys everything, so you know all of what has happened since I went M.I.A. Okay to back track a little, I had lost 47 pounds by July and found out I was pregnant again, had my second miscarriage and gained 25 pounds back (if you couldn't tell yet, I'm a SUPER emotional eater) So I was at 300 lbs until December when I dropped 10 again and went to California to see my family for Christmas. We were there when the hubby and I found I was pregnant for the third time! During the 5.5 weeks I knew I was preggo I gained 10 pounds so I was back at 300. (I had been eating 1200 calories a day, and for an almost 300 pound person that's not enough especially when you're pregnant. So I went up to somewhere between 1800-2000) Naturally I gained weight. Then in February I had my third miscarriage and of course ate everything in sight. In the last almost 5 months I've gained 39 pounds putting me at 339, the heaviest I've ever been. (May of 2009 was my previous heaviest at 330).

So there it is for you. Not proud of it, actually it makes me disgusted, which makes me want to eat more. Pft. Ridiculous cycle. Finally this weekend it clicked for me. FINALLY! But I want to take it slow. So I'm not fully on the Thyroid diet yet but I am easing myself into it. Hubby and I have already stopped eating out so much and I'm eating a lot less. (Well the eating different started a little over a week ago, but I'm finally ready to take it further) And also I started my own personal 60 day boot camp yesterday and just finished my second work out. They have been killer but I'm excited to be doing it again! I also took my measurements and pictures yesterday so I'm tracking EVERYTHING this time. And let me tell you the weight, measurements and pictures are just BAD!! I'm ready for them to go away!

So that's all for now. Lot of info I know, but as always I need you guys to know it all. I won't be blogging every day. But at least once a week for sure. I've missed you all!

115.

2011-05-22T18:09:00.000-05:00

Hello everyone! I've been gone for a long long long time and I have missed you all so much. To be honest, I almost never touch my laptop anymore. For those of you friends with me on Facebook, the only time I ever get on there is on my phone when I need to tell someone something or just to post a quick status. Job is still going great and Cory and I are fabulous :) We finally moved! It's been almost two months now but we're HERE! Oh my word we LOVE LOVE LOVE our new home and so does Skylar. We have family that live right next to us so it's fun to see them, we go on walks a lot after work (usually after it's dark cause it's been so dang hot here!) How are all of you? What's new with you guys? I'm doing pretty well! Mother's Day was pretty hard for me, but my oldest sister (the one who just had her third baby) made me feel so special. She called to tell me they'd been thinking about me all weekend and they wanted me to know that it was my day too. Of course I cried a lot after her saying that, but it made me feel so wonderful. Thank you sister for that! I've been trying new things with eating, I started eating much much healthier, mostly (about 90%) Gluten free and all our food was from whole foods....but I continued to gain about 3 pounds a week! So lame. I'm still not worried so much about my eating, I'm just taking my time with myself, I'll know when I'm ready; but now isn't the time.

Anyway, I hope to hear from you! Love you all

114.

2011-03-09T21:34:00.000-06:00

Friends, I'm so so sorry about disappearing on y'all again when I just promised I wouldn't. If I had the time right now I would create a chart of exactly why I haven't been posting. But I'm about to fall asleep so I'll just type it! 70% is because with my new job -that I love btw-, I really do not have time! And when I'm home and not sleeping my husband, I have been incredibly busy with friends and preparing for our move, then when we aren't doing that we're trying to spend quality time together before crashing for the night! The other 30% is two things, but they kind of have to do with each other. The first part is 25%, I have started going about my life again, I LOVE my new job, Cory and I are hanging out with our friends and I'm happy so much. But there is something just not connecting in my brain that will let me move on from the pain. I don't know if it's having two miscarriages in 4.5 months, (which of course makes a total of 3 in a year and a half) or what but I have never experienced this kind of a broken heart and spirit. I don't know if I should say it on here, because I know some of these women read my blog...but I'm always honest with y'all. Right before I got pregnant the second time, My sister, and a friend got pregnant...right after two friends became pregnant as well. Well my sister and the first friend had their babies this week. And the other two are talking about the excitement of it happening soon. Don't get me wrong. I AM SO SO SO SO EXCITED for all of them, especially my sister who just brought the most beautiful girl into this world. But every time I see a picture or post on facebook it's like I get stabbed in the heart and stomach at once. and, well, it's definitely not helping with me trying to heal. AGAIN, I am not blaming THEM for anything, nor am I anything less than thrilled for them. It's just my own personal demons I'm dealing with that are enjoying that that's happening at this time. So that's 25%, and because of that I can't find it in me to TRY to eat healthy and diet. The last 5% is me just not knowing what to do. I'm not trying, nor do I want to right now. Err, let me phrase that differently, I want so badly to be thinner...SO badly...but I don't want to go through the act of trying to acheive that right now. So I didn't know what to tell you guys in a post whenever I remembered to post as I was climbing into bed.

I'm sorry I disappeared....and I'm sorry if I'm disappointing you by not trying. My mind, body, heart and spirit are not even on separate pages right now...they're all in different BOOKS! I'll try to keep y'all updated more, but like I said that first 70% makes it harder to post than before. I love you all very much, and hope to hear from you.

113.

2011-02-22T07:08:00.000-06:00

AHH It's Tuesday!!! Okay so I started a new job a little over a week ago, it's full time and I'm actually doing incredibly busy work for the entire time I'm there so I can't blog while I'm there. and then I'm so tired when I get home I basically eat and go to sleep. So I keep forgetting to blog! But it doesn't help when I got to Friday last week and thought it was only Wednesday......SO I'm sorry for not being around, I probably will only blog once a week. Most likely Monday nights if I can stay awake! HAHA

Okay so I got all my food that would have been perfect had there been a freezer at work (funny thing...there actually is a freezer, I didn't find out til Friday.) So I didn't take my food so I was eating whatever everyone else was eating. I lost 3 pounds last week,and I know it would have been more had I taken my food! BUT I'm still happy about the 3 and I did pretty dang good on my diet yesterday! So we'll see how I do on a week of fully on it!

I hope you are all doing so well!!! Until next time :)

112.

2011-02-14T19:14:00.000-06:00

Hello friends! Happy Monday :) How have you been? What's been going on? I'm very thankful for the time you guys gave me, it was so needed! I do not feel like I have to be back here now, I honestly couldn't wait to get back into the swing of things!

So I found out I had a miscarriage two weeks ago tomorrow, the heart had stopped and there was unknown fluid surrounding the baby. Wednesday my amazing mom came to Texas and Thursday we had the D&C. Having my Mom here with us made things SO much easier at the beginning. My husband took Tuesday off for the appointment, thankfully! Wednesday he got home at 1p, Thursday he took off and Friday it snowed out of nowhere so practically EVERYTHING in the Austin area was shut down and he didn't have to go work patrol :) It was really nice. They made sure I was always comfortable, my Mom made amazing foods and with her there it helped Cory and I not think about it too much. Unfortunately when she left that weekend we had to face it all and we had a very hard time. This is our 3rd miscarriage for those of you who don't know, but this is the only time we've seen anything on an ultrasound, and the only time we've heard a heartbeat. So it was much more difficult than the first two. Cory had to go back to work Monday (if you remember, my work replaced me when I was put on bedrest) And Monday was really bad for me. I cried practically the entire day and I was on the edge of a bad breakdown. It was actually scaring me. No I wasn't depressed, just didn't know how to coup.

Tuesday things started to get better, I decided to apply for a few jobs, but wasn't actively looking. I knew I needed some more time to myself. However I ended up getting an interview set up for Wednesday. I did that and came straight home. Thursday our lives changed drastically again! I had my follow up appointment from the surgery and we found out that it was most likely not an "unknown pregnancy" They think it was a partial molar pregnancy, where two sperm get into one egg and only create one baby. So there is too much DNA and there is no way for the baby to survive. Dr. said it had nothing to do with Cory, my thyroid or my weight! She said IF a woman ever has a partial or complete molar pregnancy it is incredibly rare for them to have another one. And she said I only have about a 5% chance of having another miscarriage. SO it was good news all around :)

Then as I'm leaving the appointment I get a call saying I got the job I had an interview for! They told me it would be full time and how much I would be making. When I figured out how much it would be a month I realized Cory and I could get the Townhome we've been wanting SO SO bad! I started my job on Friday -and I LOVE it so far!- and we signed a lease for the Townhome on Saturday! It was incredible! Because of my job I won't be able to post blogs or respond until I get home for the day. Just to prepare you ;)

Also, I started dieting again today! I was so ready to get back. Because of the 2nd and 3rd miscarriages (and how close they were together) I was eating SO much, and most of it wasn't good. I would eat anything I could find and I'm ashamed to say I gained most of my weight back. Without trying I lost 6 pounds in two days on Thursday and Fri to put me at 310, and out of no where yesterday I gained 5 pounds! I don't know how, all I had yesterday was a bowl of cereal, and then a bowl of soup last night! So this morning I weighed 315, which was really really hard to swallow, I was embarrassed of myself. BUT That was this morning and now I'm just happy that I'm finally doing something about it again! So I hope you'll support me in making this a lifestyle!

Anyway, that's all for now! I promise I will blog more regularly now. Until next time :)

111.

2011-02-02T11:38:00.000-06:00

Hello friends. I was supposed to have my Doctor's appointment on Friday, but my Dr thought she figured out why I was having the cramps and bumped it up to yesterday. So yesterday afternoon we went in for a sonogram and unfortunately we lost our baby Peanut. The heart stopped, and the baby was surrounded by fluid that shouldn't have been there. I'm having a D&C tomorrow and thankfully my Mom is flying in to be here with us. I want to thank you all for your prayers, and please continue to pray for my husband and I.

I do want to say that I need some time. I'm going to take the next week and a half off, I hope you can all respect that and I'll be back Monday February 14. Also that will be the start of my time on the diet again. So we'll get back to what this blog started off as, but until then I'll be taking time to mourn and heal. Thank you all for being there for me.

Until next time.

110.

2011-01-31T12:10:00.000-06:00

Happy Monday everyone I hope you all had wonderful weekends! I had some friends visit since I'm on bedrest so that was nice but other than that I relaxed as much as possible! There really is no update since Friday's post other than the pain stopped increasing! It's stayed about the same since Friday which is a relief since it was getting worse every day.

Sorry this post will be short but like I said there isn't an update. Today is the last day of January so it's the last day of Thyroid Awareness Month! I hope you were all able to get the word out! I might not have another post until Friday (since we have a baby appointment that morning) Until then have a wonderful week! You are all so amazing!

Please be praying for me and Peanut!
Until next time :)

109.

2011-01-28T17:25:00.000-06:00

Hey everyone Happy Friday! I hope you had a great day and you have a wonderful weekend! There isn't much to update, I haven't thrown up since Sunday and my cramps are slowly getting worse. :/ They've changed a little, the pain is different and it has spread but definitely not better.

I've been in bed since Tuesday and that's where I feel the absolute best, yesterday I had some visitors and being on the couch really wore me out, I definitely don't feel any relief being there. Then today I had to go clean out my desk so that was hard for me, and carrying the stuff back up the stairs was pretty difficult as well! My cousin helped as much as she could, she definitely took most the weight for me! THANK YOU!! But other than that, that's it! Please continue to keep us in your prayers, they are so appreciated. Anyway like I said not much of an update, but I didn't want to leave you hanging :) We have a sono a week from today to see our baby :) Can't wait! Did I tell you guys we heard the heartbeat on Tuesday? It was the most amazing experience! Oh and here's the latest sono! This was 7 weeks 5 days.

He's our Peanut Gummybearlionanimal cracker :) Until next time!

108.

2011-01-25T12:39:00.000-06:00

Hey everyone! It's Tuesday! hahahah so we went to the Doctor this morning, and we had a much better experience with the Doctor rather than the Doctor's Assistant! First of all to answer a question, yes I did try Zofran, (sp?) That was the first one I took that didn't help, and the same one the Dr Asst doubled. I've heard it helps lots of women that are preggers, unfortunately it didn't help me!

Okay so we had a Sonogram, and we got to HEAR Peanut's heartbeat!!! AHH! It was so wonderful to hear that for the first time :) Cory and I both got all teary eyed! And he's doing well! He's growing just as he should be, and there are no blood clots or anything bad like that.

Then we went to see the Doctor, she checked me out and said that there are only two things she can think of, 1. my uterus just isn't dealing well with being preggers, 2. I have diverticulitis (sp?) She said if I do have the second it will be hard to diagnose and impossible to treat while pregnant. But they did some tests and they'll let me know, as for now I'm on bedrest. I'm thinking it's the first option, even the sono tech said something similar. She asked if I'd ever carried a baby full term, I said no. She asked if this was the farthest I'd ever been I said yes. She said your uterus is probably just freaking out not knowing what to do/what's going on because it's never been to this point yet.

So anyway, that's what's going on for now. As for the cramps, they're much worse today than yesterday. But if Peanut is safe, I'm so so so happy. I'll happily go through this if it means Peanut will grow and be healthy :) And we have another appointment late next week (Thurs or Fri) so they'll check me again and we'll see what the test results are and we'll see Peanut again! Thank you so so much for your prayers and please continue them You're all so wonderful! Until next time!!

107.

2011-01-24T20:11:00.000-06:00

Hey everyone! Happy Monday! I'm really sorry about a week without posting I've just been having a really hard time! So last Saturday I started feeling sick, and Sunday I started throwing up -totally thought I had the flu- This was NOT morning sickness at all! For exactly one week I threw up at least 5 times a day and I just kept feeling worse and worse every time I did. My mom kept telling my greasy stuff made her sick when she was pregnant and I just said yeah yeah okay Mom. Still sick! Then I started reading ingredients lists. OH MY GOODNESS you wouldn't believe how many/what foods have some type of oil or butter in them. And I tried more than a few oils and a couple butters, EVERY time felt sick half way through whatever I was eating. Yesterday morning, exactly one week after it got extreme I had 5 wheat thins -without thinking- and I threw up 5 times yesterday. I had nothing else with oil or butter in it for the rest of the day and yet I threw up everything I ate after. Today: not ONE piece of anything that had oil or butter has entered my mouth, and though I got nauseous for a few hours I never once threw up :)

My Doctor had originally prescribed something to calm the nausea, but it didn't work. Wednesday night we were in the E.R. because I wasn't keeping anything down, and they prescribed something else but it didn't help either! Which was a total bummer. Anyway, so today -my first day without excessive vomiting- I started getting bad cramps. Not the stretching to prepare for baby cramps, cramps I have only experienced after my two miscarriages. At least there's no bleeding. It was so bad not even 20 minutes into being at work I started shaking and couldn't even hold my pen. So I had to leave and went to see my Gyno, unfortunately she wasn't in today so I had to see her Medical Assistant. This person wouldn't even listen to me, she kept interrupting and she prescribed me the same meds I already tried taking. Her solution? Doubling the dose. After a while of her not listening to what I was saying I just stopped talking. I have an ultrasound in the morning to make sure Peanut is okay and then I will see my actual Dr., which I'm very excited about because she's wonderful and I know she'll listen to me. The cramps are the worst when I'm sitting up or standing. Laying down is my best friend. It also helps a lot with the nausea and lightheadedness. So anyway I've been out of work for a week, and still need to take off at least through Wednesday. We'll see what happens. Please keep all of us in your prayers! I'll keep you guys updated :) Until next time.

106.

2011-01-14T14:59:00.000-06:00

IT'S FINALLY FRIDAY, I'M FREE AGAIN! (well, almost) Okay, okay so I lied! There will be a post today. There was just too much on my mind to not have one! Warning this is long, but I promise promise promise it is worth your time! Well I think so anyway!

First - Mary Shomon and Katie Schwartz joined forces to create I Am the Face of Thyroid Disease and it finally became public! This site is awesome, it's all about showing the diversity of Thyroid patients. I actually have a video up there as well Here's mine I KNOW I KNOW I look like I'm on drugs on that snapshot, but I promise I'm not I actually look normal when you play the video! Check out the site, submit your own video if you want! -actually if you do, let me know! I'll check it out!- but I am so excited about this I think it's amazing! Also if you have time read this press release for the site It's gives a good heads up to the site and let's you know some more about Mary Shomon and Katie Schwartz! Okay I promise that's it for the links!

Next...actually this is last too. It's been happening again! Lately, I've had a few people ask how I stay so happy and positive about life if I have Thyroid problems. And no joke, one person said, "You're Thyroid must have never been that bad since you seem so carefree about life. You obviously don't know what it's like to live with something this awful." HA! Hahahahahahahahaha. Oh bless her. -If you're reading this, please take no offense. But that was definitely my reaction.-

Honestly, I could make a book about my life with health problems, and the majority would be my life with Thyroid Diseases. Actually...I'm going to do it! One of these days I WILL write a book about my life, don't worry it won't be depressing...you know me too well by now to know that I view things in a completely different way to have it be depressing.

So for those of you that haven't read from the beginning of my blog, or just need a recap; I HAVE had it that bad. It's true, this week my levels are perfect -praise the Lord!- but I have had almost 11 years of anything but. Sure 11 years, that might not seem much but remember I'm 22! That's half of my life.

I was diagnosed with Graves' Disease when I was 11, before that it had been severely interfering with my life. I was collapsing on the soccer field -and my Mom thought it was all dramatics, not that she didn't have reason too...I was a pretty dramatic child- but I had never done things such as collapse during sports, I couldn't stop moving and shaking, I drove my family NUTS because I was always going 100 miles an hour. They used to time me to see how long I could sit still. After I was diagnosed it didn't even take two years to go into remission. We thought that was it, no more worries I'm good to go. Perfect timing too, since I was just about to enter High School.

Freshman year was fine, I rarely even thought about it. Sophomore year however was totally different. I never felt good, there was always something wrong, I just felt SO off. And then I started doing really bad in school. I failed a couple classes (I'd always had As and Bs), and so no big surprise I was grounded all the time! We tried calling the Dr, No no no you're fine you're in remission remember? At the end of the year we went back and surprise surprise my levels were the worst they've ever been. The Dr told me I was going to go into a coma soon and die from how bad they were. (being told you're gonna die at 15, yeah...so are we still sure I've never had it that bad?) We had my Thyroid removed by RAI that summer and was told with Thyroid Hormone replacement I would be fine for the rest of my life. Dr visits once maybe twice a year, maybe adjusting medication every few years...no big deal. Well that right there was a lie, they could never get my levels regulated, my dose changed every 2 months and I gained 40 pounds over the next two years! But I was happy, so happy with my life that I just did not care.

Then I went to college and that's when everything changed. I gained 50 pounds in 1 semester at college. O.M.G. right?! My parent's were not happy with that, and no matter what I said about my eating habits, I'd gained way too much weight for them to believe me. Sure I was eating worse than I had when I lived at home, but when I compared what I ate against what the other girls I lived with ate, I should have gained 5 or so pounds. That Christmas break we had my levels tested again and HELLO HASHIMOTO'S DISEASE! I switched to hypo, and it was REALLY bad. I saw this specialist in Beverly Hills, and right off the bat he said I was lying about having my Thyroid removed. He said "No one's levels can be this bad if they've had their Thyroid removed." He even made me have an ultrasound on my neck to make sure it wasn't there, and when I proved I was right he goes, "Huh." I continued to get worse through his care and he blamed it on me, because he was so awesome there's no way I could have gotten worse under him. "You're eating soy aren't you!" "You don't take your pills do you!" I told him at one point that I would have someone follow me with a video camera to prove I wasn't doing either of those.

During the next year and a half at that University I had lots of struggles. I started doing bad in school once again, I started failing test after test. And only my roommates can verify that I started studying days in advance, I just could not remember anything. I started taking 3-5 hour naps during the day and still having no energy. I would forget that I was talking to my friends and would walk away mid-sentence. And the worse day of all I went into a lecture hall for an exam and couldn't remember my own name. I burst out of there and ran all the way back to my room. Even looking at my drivers license and school I.D. didn't convince me of my name, it just didn't seem to ring a bell. Also, I would work my butt off to lose some weight, then I would go right back to where I had been before (like...within a week I would gain 20-30 pounds back) By the time I left that school -after my Sophomore year was complete- I was 70 pounds heavier than when I had started.

It's been two and a half years since then, and my life is still the same roller coaster. From when I left school to my wedding day -exactly 3 months later- I gained another 30 pounds. Over the next 4 months I gained another 20 pounds. The next 5 months? Another 30 pounds putting me at my highest of 330 pounds. (oh if I didn't already say...when this whole journey started I weighed 140 and I'm 5 feet 8 inches with an athletic build) In that time, my new Endo told me that I had tumors, and after a little over a week of expensive and extensive testing we found out that no I did not have tumors -PTL!- That first day after she told me that was really rough, but I got over it before I even found out that I didn't even have them! And they still could NOT get my medication regulated until just a couple months ago. Since before I even gained most of my weight my dose has been in the 200smcg. Right now it's 275mcg. MOST Thyroid patients I talk to take anywhere from 25mcg-75mcg. Mine's so high they don't even have a pill for it, I have to take 2. And that's JUST my Thyroid, that doesn't even cover all the other health problems I have.

So ma'am if you're reading this, I'm truly sorry that you see your life through your Thyroid problems, and I'm sorry you think I'm a joke. But I HAVE had it that bad. I just would rather look at the world through rose colored glasses than through a disease.

Through all of this, as my family and friends know...I've ALWAYS been so happy. Sure it helps that I was smiling minutes after coming out of the womb (not joking...I have a picture I'll have to upload it another day), but that's not it; there are three parts to this. The main thing is my relationship with God, He has helped me through all of this. And because of Him I have so much peace and happiness about my diseases. Yea I said it, I'm happy about my disease, and my weight gain. I have come to respect it so much it's ridiculous. But here's how. I would not be the woman I am today, had I not had all of these struggles. Who knows where I would be, all I know is that it wouldn't be good. For a long time only my immediate family knew about my Thyroid problems, only recently has it started coming out; and that's mostly because of this blog. And that's another thing to be thankful for. I've met all of you! I love talking to you guys every couple days! I love getting comments and hearing updates from y'all! So 1. My relationship with God, 2. I'm naturally a happy person, and 3. I decided long ago that I would no longer let my Thyroid control my life.

I think the problem with most people who have Thyroid diseases, is that they let their disease rule them. I promise y'all it is SO amazing taking your life back. It's like a dead weight just falls off as soon as you do. And I'm not saying your symptoms will stop, or your levels will become perfect. Because most likely you'll always have to deal with those things. But if you take your life back, it doesn't become "dealing" with it. It becomes something small in the back of your mind. It makes it so much easier to live with. Promise. When I share my story with people now I get *gasp* "OH honey how do you deal with that? Are you okay now?" Every time I laugh and say, "Honestly, I'm fine. It's just how my life is." And like I've told you guys, I love my life. I don't want people feeling sorry for me, there are so many other people in the world who have it worse than me.

Okay I'm done...Sorry I know that's long but you can't say I didn't warn ya :) You guys are wonderful! Have a great weekend. Until next time!!

105.

2011-01-13T13:25:00.000-06:00

Okay I GUESS I'll let you know how the appointment went instead of making y'all wait until tomorrow :)

It went REALLY well, so well in fact I'm having trouble typing. You should see how my sentences look before I go over them ;) We saw the little one and the heartbeat! We are so so excited! So with the size of the embryo they think I wasn't off just a couple days, but 6 days! I'm only NOW 6 weeks. Which explains a lot on why we couldn't see anything last week! Anyway we're just thrilled and so is our Dr. but like she said, we're not out of the woods yet. I still need to be very careful over the next 6 weeks!

Thank you all so much for your continued prayers, they're so greatly appreciated! Right now Peanut is the size of a grain of rice (crazy to think huh?) But we're still affectionately referring to him/her as Peanut until we know if we're having a boy or girl. Haha. SO my new due date is September 8, but we would love to hold off for two days because that is my Grandma's Birthday and then we could have a baby on 9/10/11 (at 12:13 and 14 seconds!) hahah ;) Next appointment is 3 weeks from tomorrow! I already can't wait!!!

You guys are wonderful! And obviously there won't be a post tomorrow so have a great weekend! Until next time :)

104.

2011-01-12T12:20:00.000-06:00

It's the middle of the week and you know what that meanssss GHI with the hubby tonight! Excited for a night with him, he worked until after 9p last night, but tonight he's mine! :D Then tomorrow at 8a we have our baby appointment and I'm so excited! I want to hear/see something! I've never gotten to that point before! Please keep us in your prayers, I'm praying tomorrow we get good news :)

As for that perfect job, I didn't get it :/ Actually...I didn't even get my interview, they hired the first person they interviewed! Cory and I are definitely bummed, as I said before that would have been a life changer! But God has His own plan, and I'm not giving up. I've applied at 11 places since Saturday and I'm hoping one of those is the one! I really need a full time job so hubby and I can move and prepare for baby! (babIES mom haha) Oh I don't know if I told y'all...my mom is convinced I'm having twins...she's been saying that from the moment I found out I was preggo! Haha

Well that's all the update for now! Hope you're all doing well! Until next time :)

103.

2011-01-10T13:27:00.000-06:00

Happy Monday everyone! How are you all today? Did you have nice weekends? Ours was wonderful! We had dinner with the in-laws on Friday, Saturday we ran some errands and looked at some new places to live and Sunday we did groceries and major naps :)

So I'm also on the hunt for a new job, one that is full time and offers benefits. I have found one and will have an interview -hopefully- for it this week, but I know there are a few other people applying for the same position. We could really use your prayers on this one. You guys have no idea how perfect this job is for me and for my family. It could change everything for our future children, and for my husband and I. Obviously this is in God's hands...but I really hope this is in His plan for me because I have the best feeling about it, and like I said it would be beyond perfect! So I'll keep you all updated on that as well as how the baby appointment goes on Thursday! I CAN'T WAIT!

Also, I've started eating more calories to make sure I don't starve myself or the little one and guess what. I'M NOT GAINING WEIGHT! Actually, I've lost .2 pounds since I found out I was preggo! Do you remember last time I was pregnant I gained 9 pounds in just a couple weeks? So I'm very excited about this! Anyway! Thank you all for being so amazing! Until next time :)

102.

2011-01-07T15:04:00.000-06:00

HAPPY FRIDAY EVERYONE! I didn't realize it was Friday until my boss said have a nice weekend. Haha! Do y'all have anything planned this weekend? We don't. Hopefully we'll just be able to relax!

So we went to our appointment today, and after we'd been sitting there a while the lady at the front desk says, "The tech that does the sonograms isn't going to come in today. Do you want to reschedule?" I almost started crying. Even if I didn't have a history of miscarriages, I would have been bummed. But this is what we rely on...and I wanted it bad! So then my Dr.'s nurse comes up and said she was almost positive with my history that the Dr. would do a sono herself. So we decided not to reschedule, and we kept our hopes high that the Dr would do one. Annnnnnnnnnnnd she did! They did all the "confirm the pregnancy" parts of the visit, and Pregnancy was Confirmed ;) then we went for the sonogram. Right away I could tell something was different from the last time. The pregnancy sac didn't look deformed. It was round, and while that excited me there was no heartbeat to be heard, no fetus to be seen.

My Dr found the yolk sac inside the pregnancy sac and said it was forming perfectly! (as well as the pregnancy sac) She said she was not in the least bit worried that I couldn't hear anything. She said I was probably off a day or two; but with how the sacs looked she was VERY optimistic about this pregnancy. (And she's not one to sugar coat things) Of course she -us too- still wants to hear that heartbeat so I'm going in Thursday morning for another sonogram.

She also told me to not to strain myself and to take it easy. We have to be really careful with this one! So that's my update! Thank you all for the prayers! Please continue to pray for us!!! Until next time :)

101.

2011-01-05T13:51:00.000-06:00

It's Wednesday! An all new season of Ghost Hunters International starts tonight! And I'm actually excited because it's now Barry and Kris Williams instead of Rob. No offense Rob...but we weren't the hugest fans..... ;) Since I'm talking about that...I am indeed a Christian, and no I do not believe in Ghosts. But I do believe in Demons, because they're in the Bible, and I believe they can present themselves in any way, and some of those ways may be "ghostly"! WITH all that said...whatever it is they "find" on the show...these shows are too interesting not to watch!

Also I have my first baby appointment on Friday to hear the heartbeat! I will be 6 weeks on Friday so hopefully all is well, and we will actually be able to hear it! YAY! Thank you for your prayers!

Last: -and I can't believe I forgot about this until last night- IT'S JANUARY which means it's THYROID AWARENESS MONTH! Yay for our own special month. :) Remember: TAKE YOUR LIFE BACK! Don't let your Thyroid control your life, control your Thyroid! You all are so wonderful and so special! I'm glad I have you in my life! until next time :)

100.

2011-01-03T13:01:00.000-06:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! How were your holidays? Mine were fabulous! I had such a nice relaxing time with my family :) It was definitely a much needed vacation. I actually gained a few pounds while I was there -not a big surprise- I weighed 292 before I went, and when I got back I weighed in at 295. So my grand total of weight loss for the year 2010: 35 pounds. I can't find any reason to be upset with that number at all. I'm thrilled that I'm less than I was this time last year. :)

Another little something for you all: I was feeling way off last week. different things kept happening, and I just kept shrugging them off. Then one night I was sitting there and was thinking about everything that had been happening and realized something once they were all put together. so I went to check my calendar and realized I was also 3 days late... I joked about it with my Mom and hubby, but we still went and took a test anyway. Results? I'm pregnant! It's pretty crazy but still exciting! Oh and no worries, it's not dangerous. I needed to have 2 normal cycles after the D&C before I could get pregnant again, and I had exactly 2 normal cycles. My Dr and her nurse said there's nothing to worry about in that aspect, and I have my first appointment this Friday to hear the heartbeat! Now if you remember, this appointment coming up on Friday is the appointment I had when I found out I had miscarried. It's also the furthest I've ever gotten. I'm not dreading this appointment though, I'm incredibly excited! I think no matter what, if I have another miscarriage, it will hurt the same if I'm excited, or not. SO I decided I'm going to be excited!

Please please please keep us in your prayers. They're so appreciated! Until next time :)

99.

2010-12-22T13:29:00.000-06:00

IT'S ALMOST CHRISTMASSSSSSSS! And I can't wait! My hubby and I will be in California for the next week spending time with my family :) That also means there will not be a new post until the new year! I hope you all have an amazing Christmas and Happy New Year as well! I can't wait to see what 2011 has in store for my life, and I'm sure it will be fabulous!

I'm hoping some time soon after 2011 has started, I will be ready to get back on track with actively trying to lose weight! In 2010 I lost 55 pounds and I managed to keep almost 3/4 of that weight off, even with the very trying time of having my second miscarriage!! **My first post of the new year -also post #100!- will say how much I weigh on January 1, 2011. (Remember I was 330 lbs on January 1, 2010)

You all saw how I beat myself up so much after gaining some of that weight back, and struggling with myself to diet again. And you were all there for me through it all, now I can finally see it how you guys saw did. Yes I did gain some weight back, but that's still a LOT of weight off my body, and looking at it that way... I'm so EXCITED! OH OH OH OH!! And get this:: This is the VERY FIRST year in 7 years that I have ended up being lighter, rather than heavier at the end of the year!! Can you believe it?! No matter how the end of this year went for me that's still a huge accomplishment, as any hypothyroid patient knows!

Well I guess that's all for now. I love you all, you mean the world to me! Happy Holidays from Cory and I! Until next time :)

98.

2010-12-15T14:11:00.000-06:00

Half way through the work week! I'm quite excited if you couldn't tell! Tonight I have some people on my Scentsy team coming over to chill for a bit, tomorrow is my hubby's work Christmas party (which I'm really excited about...we all go out all the time, they are the best group of people!) Friday is my hubby's last day of work for over 2 weeks! -jealous...but now he can help with chores hahaha!- and this weekend is last minute shopping for our Cali trip, and I'm getting my hair and nails done! So once I leave work today I'll be busy busy which means the next week will go by fast! Yay!

Weight loss is truckin along...not going very fast but I'm losing small amounts each day so that's good :) I'm actually really sick again :( I started feeling it this weekend, but it wasn't too bad just annoying. But today it hit me like a semi and I look&feel horrible! Because of that this post won't be too long, I'm having a hard time keeping my eyes open and I'm at work! Yikes! Well I hope you all have a wonderful day! Until next time :)

97.

2010-12-13T13:47:00.000-06:00

HAPPY MONDAY! How did your weekends go? Ours was wonderful! Spent some time with my cousin and her baby Saturday afternoon, hung out with friends that night and then Sunday was all me and my hubby! We finally put up the Christmas tree! We weren't going to, because we'll be out of state for Christmas, but my hubbs saw how much I wanted to put it up so we did :) It looks BEAUTIFUL!

I didn't lose or gain anything this weekend, but I'm fine with that. Every day I realize more and more how I messed everything up, and how much I need this time to heal and re-think the whole diet situation. I actually ordered the fat flush smoothie shake down and it will probably be coming at the end of this week. Next week I'll start it but I won't continue it on my Christmas vacay. Not that I don't think I could, but our lovely Mary Shomon told me not to. She said "just go be with your family, enjoy it and enjoy the food. Don't eat a plate of cookies, but don't worry about it either. Continue on the smoothie shake down when you get back to give you a jump start and see what happens after." Well...sounds good to me! I will do exactly as she said, I won't go crazy, but I won't worry about it either.

I had so much energy this morning, which was a PERFECT way to start a Monday and a week. I was actually planning on not doing a thing but I needed a pair of jeans washed...next thing you know I have all of our clothes, towels and my hubby's uniforms (4 loads of laundry) done and put away, all the dishes from this weekend cleaned and put away, the dog walked, our wifi fixed...and I'm sitting there waiting to go to work an hour early! I'm still shocked! Well anyway. I hope you all had a great weekend and Monday! Until next time :)

96.

2010-12-10T12:50:00.001-06:00

Happy Friday everyone :) I hope you're excited for this weekend, do you have anything fun going on? I'm going to spend time with the hubbs and some friends hopefully!

Weight loss is going pretty well actually, I've lost a bit of weight this week and I'm quite excited about that. Actually my entire post was going to be my excitement on that subject, but then I got to work and I had a message waiting from a friend...

This friend is going through a lot of what I am currently going through, and every few weeks we see how each other is doing. She was speaking with a friend about her recent miscarriage, and a manager of a bookstore overheard them and recommended a song to her. She said this just happened yesterday, and it's already helping her cope; she hoped it would help me. I got on iTunes and listened to a clip then immediately downloaded it. I pulled up the lyrics and read along until the tears pouring out of my eyes made it impossible to see. This song is so emotional, but it gives me so much hope and I can't help but be happy when I hear it. Does that sound weird? Well now I have that song, and Breathe by Ryan Starr on repeat and I'm having a -now- quiet emotional time in my office. And I can feel things changing. Friend...thank you, a thousand times thank you.

The song is Glory Baby by Watermark. I can't even give you a clip of the song...I need to do the entire thing:

Glory baby you slipped away as fast as we could say baby…baby..
You were growing, what happened dear?
You disappeared on us baby…baby..
Heaven will hold you before we do
Heaven will keep you safe until we’re home with you…
Until we’re home with you…

Miss you everyday
Miss you in every way
But we know there’s a
day when we will hold you
We will hold you
You’ll kiss our tears away
When we’re home to stay
Can’t wait for the day when we will see you
We will see you
But baby let sweet Jesus hold you
‘till mom and dad can hold you…
You’ll just have heaven before we do
You’ll just have heaven before we do

Sweet little babies, it’s hard to
understand it ‘cause we’re hurting
We are hurting
But there is healing
And we know we’re stronger people through the growing
And in knowing-
That all things work together for our good
And God works His purposes just like He said He would…
Just like He said He would…

BRIDGE:
I can’t imagine heaven’s lullabies
and what they must sound like
But I will rest in knowing, heaven is your home
And it’s all you’ll ever know…all you’ll ever know…

Until next time friends.

95.

2010-12-08T13:57:00.000-06:00

HAPPY WEDNESDAY!!! This week is half way done! YES! It's not even just to get to the weekend. I'm just ready for this whole week to go away! How are you guys doing? I'm feeling pretty fabulous lately I'm not going to lie! I've actually still continued to weigh daily. But I only did because I wasn't dreading it. It was more of a "Hey I guess I'll step on the scale this morning!" kind of thing. We'll get to how the results were in a bit. But here's my week:

Monday actually went pretty well. I knew I was going to a Mexican restaurant that night for a dinner meeting, and I decided that I really wanted the food. So I chose what I was going to eat that day according to fullness. Not calories. I ate pretty well and when the meeting came I ate my chips and my dinner, though I didn't finish it. I took my time eating it and I only got about half way in before I just couldn't take another bite. But I enjoyed every bit of it!

Tuesday went really well too! I ate my food that I normally would on my diet and was at a friends house when she pulled out pound cake slices. They looked amazing and I was pretty hungry because I hadn't had dinner so I broke off a corner of one slice, ate it and then closed the lid. She opened it again to take more so I went to sit on the couch. Yes I was still hungry, but I knew I was eating dinner later...and I got my taste of it so that was all I needed. And honestly it didn't bug me that I didn't take more. I didn't think of it as..."Oh! I can't have that" Honestly that made all the difference. I let myself know I could have it, I just only needed a little though. Then I ate dinner later which was pretty darn delicious. But an hour later I was still hungry so the hubbs and I had some popcorn!

So then Tuesday morning I stepped on the scale and I had actually lost a little bit of weight on Monday. I was shocked. Normally I gain weight when I eat Mexican food! Then today I step on the scale and I had lost more than 2 pounds yesterday! I just looked at Cory and said "no way!" I got on again to make sure it was correct and it was! So I'm feeling pretty good! I'm still working to not make it a forced diet, but I think I'm doing pretty well so far!

Anyway! I hope you all have a wonderful day! until next time :)

94.

2010-12-06T13:52:00.000-06:00

Happy Monday everyone! I hope you had great weekends! I feel like lately I don't get much of a weekend but it's good to get caught up on stuff! So I actually lost weight this weekend! And I'm pretty surprised because I didn't do the best with eating, nor did I try to focus on the diet. This weekend was so hectic, and spending hours helping friends move out of the house we didn't eat the best! I lost exactly half a pound though so I was actually pretty excited! I was not looking forward to that time on the scale.

With me trying to make this a lifestyle change, first thing that has to go is weighing in every morning. It stresses me out even if I know I did well the day before! And now I'm trying to focus my life on different things, and IT STILL STRESSES ME OUT! So I'll be weighing in every Monday and letting you know how I did for the week, not the day. -I'll still blog three times a week- I'm hoping that will take some of the tension away. If it backfires and I ended up gaining more weight because I'm not stepping on it everyday, then I will definitely go back to doing so!

I can feel my break-through coming. My poor husband has to deal with it though. Haha. I've been quite angry this last week...any little thing has set me off. But I know my anger comes first, then the sadness, and finally the healing. So it's coming and I'm ready for it! Hopefully once that has all finished...that little part of me that wants to actually focus on losing weight will click and I'll get to it. Continue praying for me friends, I definitely need it and thank you again for being there! Until next time :)

93.

2010-12-03T08:55:00.000-06:00

Happy Friday everyone :) I hope this day starts a wonderful weekend! Mine should be pretty good! I might be taking a quick trip to Temple, TX with a friend to help her move stuff back here, and I have a Scentsy party Saturday night that I'm very excited for! Have you guys checked out my Scentsy site? I have a link up top but here it is My Scentsy Site!

I don't know about the rest of you but I happen to be one of those people who loves the Twilight Saga. To be honest I love the books much more than the movies, in my opinion, I think they could have chosen better actors BUT because I love the books so much, I can't help but love the movies regardless of the acting skill. So the third movie is coming out in stores tonight at midnight and I'm pretty excited - it's definitely the best one so far, acting isn't incredible awful! So all of that to say: my hubby knows how much I love it, and although he's not a fan...we're spending Sunday watching the first three movies on the couch :) hahahaha. poor guy! But he's so wonderful :) I think the only reason he agreed to that is because he's secretly in love with the girl who plays Alice ;) If you've never read or watched them before and are interested: START WITH THE BOOKS!!!! And here is one thing: I'm not into Vampires and stuff like that, never have been. But this isn't the intense Vampireness of say True Blood. It's kind of the back story, the main part of these books is the love story and it is incredible!

Okay enough of Twilight. So I actually wasn't able to weigh this morning, when I woke up there was a text from my boss saying the other lady I work with was sick and they needed me to come in early. I was out of bed and out the door within 12 minutes! Pretty proud of myself :) But obviously couldn't weigh, I did weigh yesterday however and I did lose...but don't get excited it was .1 pound. hahaha. I'm doing well on my diet, obviously it's not my main focus but I'm trying to turn it into a life style other than a diet. I used to think of it as a lifestyle until I wanted to do my crunch time and that changed it all. So that's where I am with the diet, as for my healing time. I'm not there yet...I'm not sure I know how to start the process right now. I know if I would have been normal and started it two months ago I would have been fine. Now? Not so much. And I know I'll never get over this, I'm still not over the first one. But I did move on from the first one. I need to get to the point where I can move on from the second one. Anyway thank you all for your comments and encouragement, it meant SO much to me :) I love you all! Have a great weekend! Until next time

92.

2010-12-01T11:03:00.000-06:00

Warning: This post....is intense and emotional for me. It's not one of my regular posts.

Happy Wednesday everyone :) Sorry I haven't had a post for a week! I hope you all had a great Thanksgiving, and if you went Black Friday shopping I hope you came home with awesome deals! Friday I was busy spending time with my husband, but I would have told you, I'm not happy with how I did on Thanksgiving, well I am...but I'm not at the same time. I had one spoon full of mashed potatoes -and you guys probably don't know mashed potatoes are my WEAKNESS I could do a whole plate of just that. So one spoon was good for me, and I had one roll, some dressing, a few slices of ham -I don't like Turkey-, and lots of green beans. Then I was doing really well not eating any of the desserts there...until I saw there was a banana pudding thing. I ended up sharing some with my hubby :( I was fine with eating a roll, I bought whole wheat so I could have one. but I didn't want to have dressing, mashed potatoes OR dessert. What I am happy about, is I didn't even have one plate full of food, and half of that food was the green beans. So that's still good for Thanksgiving - but I still ate too much. I didn't gain weight that day, but the next day I did gain. It wasn't a big number at all...but not losing the day before added with that put me back a bit. I didn't do bad on my diet on Friday...but I did have a hot chocolate. A hot chocolate and doing perfect on my diet. Anyway if you couldn't tell I was more than frustrated. It's cold out and I love to be able to have a hot chocolate, not every day of course but sometimes. And yes you could say I can just have tea? But I have tea EVERY DAY. I want a hot chocolate sometimes!!!! :( Anyway that had upset me, so I didn't really pay attention to what I ate the rest of the weekend. -I don't know why I do that, I've always been an emotional eater (i.e. after the miscarriage) but it's frustrating I don't want to be like that- I didn't gain or lose anything this weekend which of course put me back a little bit more. SO that was this weekend...

Then my hubby and I had a very long very emotional talk Monday night. Ever since the miscarriage I'm constantly asking him to help me with my diet, because I've been finding it harder and harder to do it. I know I've talked about this a few times, and then I think....Okay! I got it now and I'm gonna push through this! And I'm sure you've all seen in my posts that I'm still really struggling. Struggling with gaining weight when I do perfect on my diet, struggling with when I gain weight just eating something I shouldn't. Struggling with not being able to say no to bad foods. So he finally just told me, "Either you're on your diet or you're not." that pulled me up short, I hadn't been expecting anything like that from him, and that started a 3 hour talk about what's going on with me. I found out a lot about me that night and I'll tell you, it's funny how much you can lie to yourself.

I've been telling everyone, including myself, that I'm fine with the most recent miscarriage and that I'm getting on with my life. And the truth is I'm not. At all apparently. For some reason -subconsciously- I'm just not letting go. Also, I know this isn't true, but I can't stop thinking that my miscarriages are my fault; and honestly, it's really messing with me. I feel like such a big part of me died when that happened, and I can't find that part of me anymore no matter how hard I try. And in there, is the part of me that gets me to push on, know what I want and go for it. It's like I can't find the me that wants to do something for me to make me happy; and that includes my diet and losing weight. I want to, but I can't find it in me to try to do it. I eat healthy, I don't eat a lot. I still eat anywhere from 900-1200 calories in a day. But if a cookie is in front of me, I can't find a reason not to eat it. Anyway there's a lot more to that story, but I can't figure out the words to put it out there.

So that was Monday and I've been dealing with that ever since. It's been really hard, that realization brought with it a lot of hard emotions and truths I didn't want to admit. I've been waiting for something since then to help me heal and get through this. -I know...it's been two months since the miscarriage and I should already be past this point, but I didn't take time to heal then. I just focused on putting it out of my mind instead of dealing with it- So then The Biggest Loser came on last night, but I didn't watch it until I opened up my computer to write this. I'd already seen the results so I just had it on and was kinda going in and out. Then the part where they put all their weight back on and had to do the step-ups and mile came on. At that point I was writing my post and it had something to do with I'm having a hard time right now, please understand I need some time. There might not be another post until next week...and then I hear this song coming from the TV. So I stopped typing and listened more...next thing I know I have tears streaming down my face. I went and downloaded it on iTunes really fast so I could hear the whole thing and then I started crying harder. It's called "Breathe" by Ryan Star. Here is part of the song:
"Breathe, just breathe, take the world off your shoulders and put it on me. Breathe, just breathe, let the life that you live be all that you need. Let go of the fear, let go of the doubt, let go of the ones that try to put you down. You're gonna be fine, don't hold it inside, if you hurt right now then let it all come out."

I really needed that song to come into my life. Thank you Biggest Loser. After that I deleted everything and started over. You guys need to know my struggles...that's what my whole blog is about! And me not telling you of my struggles is what got me to the place I was at on Monday. Not able to do anything for myself, not able to let go, not able to find the me who could push through this weight issue. So now I'm healing, and I'm praying I can put all of Molly back together. My husband is amazing, and he's been nothing but supportive and there for me. Thank you Cory :) and thank you for that simple sentence that made me learn so much.

I've been putting my difficult times, and struggles aside because I "needed to lose weight before I saw my family again." in the end it did nothing but backfire. So family...I don't know where I'll be at Christmas. I'm still hoping I'll be where I was when Mom came in July. But until I fix myself, I can't conquer this mountain known as my weight.

You know how I knew it just got to be too much? On Monday and yesterday I did perfect on my diet. I MEAN PERFECT. Perfect perfect. I walked 2 miles Monday, and 1 mile yesterday. You know what? I gained 1.5 pounds. I ate 1100 calories both days. 1.5 pounds. There's definitely something wrong there right? I'm still going to be eating healthy and sticking to the Thyroid Diet as much as possible. But I can't be focused on that right now, it can't be my only goal. I have my life, my emotions, and my sanity to focus on. I hope you guys agree that I need to have those in order in order to make my life about losing weight. I WILL CONTINUE my blogging every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. and I will continue to let you know how I'm doing with my weight loss. But my blog will also be about how I'm doing. So let's get this weight off my shoulders so I can lose the weight in my stomach eh? :) I love you all. Thank you for being there.
Until next time :)

91.

2010-11-24T12:22:00.000-06:00

Happy Thanksgiving Eve everyone! I hope you all have wonderful time with family and loved ones this week! And don't forget to watch what you eat! If you can, find out all the food that will be there and really think about what you want to eat and make sure to stick to your plan! I'll be rootin for you, please root for me! haha. My goal is to lose weight tomorrow! So let's see if I can do it!

I re-evaluated my weight loss schedule and I'm actually doing pretty darn good this week! Lost a good amount Monday and a pretty okay amount yesterday! Happy about that :) How's T-Tapp going? I'm still in love! It makes me feel good and it's fast LOVE that. How about for you guys? Is it easier now than it was in the beginning?

Well definitely excited about tomorrow, -it's also my hubby's Birthday- and today is my Friday at work! Just gotta make it through today and i have four days of being with him and our family & friends I CAN'T WAIT! If you're traveling, be safe! Until next time :)

90.

2010-11-22T08:57:00.000-06:00

Happy Monday! It's Thanksgiving week! What are you guys thankful for? I'm incredibly thankful for my family. Both my family, and my husband's family are so wonderful and they're always there for us. I'm thankful for all of you for being here for me as well! I'm mostly thankful for everything God has given me in my life. No matter what it is, even if it's dressed as a disease, it's always a blessing in disguise. :)

I lost a bit of weight last week, but this weekend there was absolutely nothing. And the funny thing is, I was surrounded by bad food, that I didn't eat. You know I really am happy that at least I didn't gain weight, but it just puts me that much farther back from being where I want to be. When I first started this "crunch time" I felt like the amount of weight I wanted to lose was definitely do-able. I'm seeing now that I was definitely hoping too high. I'm not saying I'm stopping, but I'm going to kind of take another look at where I'm going to hope to be. I'll give you a hint...I was hoping to be a good chunk lighter than where I was when my mom came to see me in July -if you remember how much I weighed...then you'll get a feel for it- but now...I'm going to have to push to even make it to where I was when my mom came. I have not been lying to you all, I do tell you if I lose, or gain. But of course I can see how it's difficult since I don't say numbers. When I lose a "big number" it means I lost exactly what I needed to lose that day, or more. If I "lost weight" it means I lost, but it wasn't as much as I needed to lose that day. And obviously gain or staying the same, is exactly what it means.

So anyway...I'm going to re-evaluate my weight loss for the next month, since knowing that I'm not where I need to be is just making it that much harder. Hopefully I'll be what I was when my Mom came...I know that gives a lot away, but that's what's going on right now, and since I've been saying I'm not where I want to be, I thought you all should get a hint. Thank you all for your support! Until next time :)

89.

2010-11-19T09:14:00.000-06:00

HAPPY FRIDAY! I'm glad the weekend is finally here, but it's not much of a difference I've been home since Wednesday early afternoon! Started getting a fever Wednesday and my cold turned into a flu :( Left work early and thought my fever was done that afternoon cause my temp was pretty normal. But then it got really bad late Wednesday night/early Thursday morning. So I stayed home yesterday cooped up in bed with my loving and loyal puppy. *she's having sick days too :)* I no longer have a fever, but work and the hubbs told me to stay home today as well. Which I guess is good because I can heal more and I doubt anyone could understand me if I picked up the phone! Hopefully I get better because I have my Scentsy launch party tomorrow night! Thankfully my husband has been great already cleaning for it since I've been sick.

Speaking of Scentsy, I officially sell Scentsy now!!! You guys can go check out my website https://mollysscentsations.scentsy.us/Home I'm so excited to finally be selling it, I just love Scentsy and I love being able to share it and introduce it to people! :)

Weight loss is going good but I'm not exactly following the diet these last couple days. It's been soup, orange juice, bananas, sprite and crackers. I'm not eating a lot, but all those have lots of calories/sodium. I actually have lost some weight since Wednesday too but not a lot. Almost a days worth in the last couple days. At least it's going down and not up!!!

Well I hope you are all doing wonderfully and have a great weekend! Thanksgiving is almost here -which is also my hubbys Birthday-!!! Until next time :)

88.

2010-11-17T14:06:00.000-06:00

HAPPY WEDNESDAY! We're halfway through the week! How is everyone doing? I'm fabulous! I can't believe it's already over halfway through November! Where is this year going?

Not going to lie I almost forgot about this post. It is Thursday in my mind, I was crushed when I found out it wasn't :( But at least it reminded me to get on here! So did not do T-Tapp this morning, I've been sick since Monday and it's gotten progressively worse over the past few days. I'm surprised I got myself dressed and to work! But I have been weighing in! I actually gained weight on Monday and was so shocked! I did so perfect on my diet, T-Tapped and felt like I had a perfect day -regarding weight loss- to get on and gain weight! It pushed me back another couple days! So then yesterday I kept pushing on, did my eating, didn't T-Tapp but come last night I was starving. I had eaten the exact same amount as the day before but it was 6:30p and my stomach wouldn't stop growling! So I ended up eating another 200 calories and guess what...I lost all the weight I gained on Monday PLUS another couple days worth! YAY!

So here's where I'm confused...If you eat too much -which, when you're a Thyroid patient still isn't a lot- your body doesn't burn up enough calories and you gain weight. If you don't eat enough, your body thinks you're starving it so it holds on to your calories and you lose weight. HOW ON EARTH ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO FIND THE HAPPY MIDDLE!? Because this is how my diet is going *no matter what I weigh!*:
Eat 1300 calories - gain weight
Eat 1200 calories - lose weight
Eat 1200 calories - lose weight but not nearly as much
Eat 1200 calories - don't lose or gain at all
Eat 1100 calories - lose weight
Eat 1100 calories - gain weight
Eat 1200 calories - lose weight
Eat 1200 calories - don't lose really anything
Eat 1150 calories - lose weight
Eat 1150 calories - gain weight
Eat 1350 calories - lose a lot of weight

*Oh and I've checked, the days I do T-Tapp doesn't affect this. It's just random days* How am I supposed to know how much to eat?! Because it's not like I starve myself. If my stomach is growling, and water isn't cutting it, I will eat more. But on days where it's not happening, I eat how much I need.

Anyway...I'm confused, but very happy I lost a big number yesterday. If anyone can help it would be much appreciated! Until next time :)

87.

2010-11-15T09:25:00.001-06:00

Hello everyone! It's Monday!! Don't get a case of the Mondays...just be happy that you get to see this day! How did everyone's weekend go? Mine was pretty good! Had fun with friends and the hubbs, and ended up having to buy a new washer/dryer yesterday! We tried to fix ours so many times but it was done :( I actually lost quite a bit of weight this weekend! Pretty dang excited about that! I lost two pretty big numbers both on Saturday and Sunday! LOVE THAT! Unfortunately I'm still a little behind but I am catching up! *by the way...if you don't understand what I mean by -behind- it's that I have a certain weight I want to be at every day (i mapped it all out) and if I'm behind it means I'm losing weight, I'm just not where I should be that day. If I'm ahead, then obviously I'm losing more weight than I had hoped to!*

So here's something that I realized about myself on Friday...I'm an instant pleasure/happiness kind of
person. If I want something, I want it right then. That goes for everything from expensive purses and TVs to food. I'll get a craving for food and even if it's not on my diet I'll want it right then, I just have to have it. So I'll eat it, and I'll be happy that I did, but the next day when the scale doesn;t budge, or I gain weight....I'll be extremely upset that I did in fact eat it. And then there are times when I really want something, but I don't eat it. No joke I will think about it for the rest of the night and how much I want it, the next day however I'm stoked I didn't eat it because I will have lost weight. Unfortunately it is a process to get to the point where I'm not an -instant happiness- kind of person. My husband is helping me though, and hopefully some day I will conquer this! It is important to overcome this in order to control my weight. and I'm doing everything to get there.

Anyway I hope you all have a wonderful day! Until next time :)

86.

2010-11-12T08:28:00.000-06:00

Hello everyone! I hope you're all doing wonderful! Ready for the weekend? I am! This week at work has been CRAZY! It's beautiful outside today :) It's raining right now and it's supposed to storm the rest of the day! Though it's going to be 80 degrees today a cold front is coming in tonight, and the high for the weekend is in the low 60s! Can't wait. What do you all have going on for the weekend? I'm going to a little "Peddler's Fair" tomorrow, the lady I'm going to be selling Scentsy under is having a booth for Scentsy so I'm going to help her and check out the rest of the fair, should be fun! Might do some stuff with friends, but it should be pretty relaxing!

Weight loss and T-Tapp goin good! I told you I was behind, and I still am buuuuut I'm losing the amount of weight I'm supposed to every day, so I'm not getting more behind! T-Tapp is good! I look forward to it because I feel so much better after it's done and I love that! It gives me a little extra bounce in my step and I have so much energy throughout the rest of the day! Can't beat that especially with hypothyroidism, am I right? Well I hope you all have a great next couple days! Until next time :)

85.

2010-11-10T08:30:00.000-06:00

Happy Wednesday everyone! It's cool and foggy here this morning! Love that! How are you all feeling? I haven't heard from a lot of you lately on how your progress is going or how you're feeling I would love to know. I'm doing really well right now! I'm almost caught back up to being exactly where I want to be at this day. I'm just barely behind, but I know I'll catch up! T-Tapp is still going good! I can feel that it's so much easier, but it still kicks my butt every time! I love it!
What do you guys have going on for Thanksgiving? Traveling anywhere? Going to see family? What are you most excited for? I know it's a ways away but even with my diet I have to tell you I'm most excited about the food! Because I already know what we're having and I'm putting in my mind now what I'll be having. I'll be having veggies, some -not much- cranberry sauce and turkey and ham! No dressing no potatoes no dessert! I'm excited to see how I do and excited to not have that "full all day and the next" feeling!
Well I hope you all are doing fabulous have a wonderful day! Until next time :)

84.

2010-11-08T10:36:00.000-06:00

It's Monday! I wish the weekends were longer, but I'm actually excited that it's Monday. It just means it's one week closer to going to California! :) I actually did not lose any weight this weekend! I stayed the exact same as I was on Friday. Kinda confused since I actually did quite well, but that's okay just pushing on through today! So my weekend was fabulous! I had so much fun, how about y'all? Do anything fun? Do anything...not fun? Haha our dryer broke last night, with half of our clothes already through the washer, and the other half still soaked and in the broken dryer. Hahah it was not thrilling, but we're trying to fix it!

So I have some exciting news! I'm going to start selling Scentsy: wickless candles very soon, my launch party is in a little less than 2 weeks, and after that I'll get my own website up and running. So you guys can go to the website once it's up and check out products -and if you want- buy through the website. **Everyone not in North America unfortunately can't buy yet. Scentsy is currently working on products that will fit electrical outlets for everyone not in North America, and they actually have LED light bulbs. It's going to be really cool! I'll let you all know when it comes out** Scentsy is all light bulbs and wax, so there are no fires, soot, smoke or anything bad like that. It makes your entire house smell fabulous and I'm addicted to it! They also have room sprays (one spritz and your room smells wonderful for days, sometimes weeks!), tins for your car, circles for your closets, and much much more!

Anyway that's my news for now :) Love to all! have a great day! Until next time

83.

2010-11-05T12:27:00.000-05:00

I can't believe it's Friday already! I mean...I can but still. HAPPY FRIDAY! Do you guys have anything fun lined up for this weekend? My hubby doesn't have to work off-duty tonight so I think we're going on a date :) Saturday is a "Girl Party" with a good group of friends, and Saturday night is my hubby's best man's Birthday. He's having a little bash at his house 1/2 BDay 1/2 Going away (he's leaving for the military) Sunday we might be doing a late birthday with some friends but not sure yet! Just a weekend full of fun and I LOVE that!

So I've been losing every day, but it did slow down a little bit this whole week. While I was ahead this last weekend, I'm now behind a little over a day. But that's okay :) Losing is still losing right?? And I lost a BIG number yesterday which was a good surprise! Way to kick off the weekend right?

T-Tapp is my new love -Shh! Don't tell Cory!- I woke up this morning and my back was bothering me so much. Actually, it hurt so bad i almost didn't do T-Tapp, but I knew I had to so I started anyway and guess what. NO back pain now. I feel amazing. That Primary Back Stretch was exactly what I needed. Anyway I hope you all have an amazing weekend! Until next time :)

82.

2010-11-03T08:28:00.000-05:00

Hello everyone! Happy Wednesday! How are you all doing? Thanks for the Birthday wishes I had a wonderful day! First of all, a cold front came in late Monday night so it was in the 50s/low 60s all day and it rained! It was wonderful :) That alone would have made my day wonderful, but I also got a lot of love from friends, family and co-workers. I am very blessed to have every one of you in my life and again thank you for being there for me! My hubby got me a gorgeous pair of diamond heart earrings, and when I walked into my office there were flowers! I didn't even know they knew it was my birthday! I went to work with a big smile on my face and a tea in a red starbucks cup! (yay! That means Winter!) After I met up with the in-laws to vote (good job TX!), and a little while later went out to dinner with them and the hubbs! It was really just a nice day :)

I also did VERY well on my diet last night, I am very proud of myself because it was hard! But seeing the next morning that you lost weight is all worth it! T-Tapp today! As soon as I get off here I'm going to do it and I'm excited! I now look forward to my work out days-I'm pretty sure that's not how it normally is :) What's new with all of you? How are you all doing? You are all wonderful! Guess what! I get to wear a jacket today! I love Fall/Winter! :) Until next time!

81.

2010-11-01T14:16:00.000-05:00

HAPPY NOVEMBER & HAPPY MONDAY! Once Halloween hits there is always a big smile on my face. November and December are by far my favorite months of the year! You have some wonderful holidays, amazing weather, fun decorations and Christmas music! Love it! :) How did everyone's weekend go? Was everyone safe? Mine was pretty nice! The hubby and I ran some errands early Saturday morning, and pretty much stayed in bed until Sunday afternoon! It was wonderful! Sunday night was spent with the in-laws and it was very nice!

So weight loss is going good still! didn't lose a ton over the weekend but still lost! Today is my first day of T-Tapping every other day. Felt weird not doing it on Sunday so it was nice to get back to it today! Did very well on my diet this weekend and it was so encouraging to have my husband tell me how proud of me he is :) Tomorrow is my 22nd Birthday, so the in-laws are taking us out for dinner! I made sure I got to pick the restaurant and I told them, along with my hubby, what I'm ordering so they'll hold me to it and I won't be tempted to cheat on my diet. I feel very in control right now and I love that, just knowing I'm in control makes me already feel so much better about myself!

I hope you all have a wonderful next couple days! Until next time :)

80.

2010-10-29T12:41:00.003-05:00

HAPPY FRIDAY! I am so excited today is Friday! The last few weekends haven't been real weekends, and although we are doing stuff this weekend, we still have more time to relax! :) So how are all of you? What do you have going on for Halloween? We're just going to the in-laws to help pass out candy! (and I will be staying away from it!)

The weight loss is going wonderfully! On Wednesday, I was right where I needed to be, Thursday I was where I needed to be today, and today I'm where I need to be tomorrow! I was getting rather confused because I was putting up big numbers and today, although I still lost it was quite a small amount. I didn't let it get me down, I just went and did my 5th day of T-Tapp (which happened to be the hardest!) and got a surprise after, mother nature decided today was the day to visit. It makes a LOT of sense: weight slowed and I was starting to get worried about this weekend because yesterday I was craving chocolate, though I didn't allow myself any I was scared I wouldn't be able to hold that together this weekend! But I've started, and there are no cravings today so my hopes are high for Sunday!

I only have ONE more day of T-Tapp before I get to go to every other day! I'm so excited I've made it! I've tried to do the "6 days straight" three times before and failed by the third/fourth day. Not this time!

One last thing, and it's kind of a BIG thing. I know a lot of people that are just not happy with their lives in general, and in the now. Whatever it is, "I have a cold" (you'd be surprised how many people without diseases think colds are the end of the world), "I'm fat", "I hate my job", "I'm never going to find someone, so I'm just going to stop looking", "He broke up with me and I'm refusing to move on". We all know at least one person like that right? It's sad, I just shake my head and send a little prayer their way. Not that whatever they're complaining about will get better, but that they can see how much good there is in their lives. I get a lot of people telling me how bubbly and positive I always am, and I love hearing that because that's what I strive for and I'll tell you why!
-Yes! I have a disease that makes me feel like crap
-Yes! Because of another problem my ligaments blow out
-Yes! I have stomach problems Doctors can't figure out but you know what...there are tons of people out there that have it way worse than me. So I don't like to complain to others (yes my husband hears my struggles but that's what he's there for) great friends are there for that too, but I know they don't always want to hear what I'm dealing with. So this is how I live my life -and no, I'm not being fake to everyone, I am actually like this on the inside too because trust me it's so much better to live this way, than the other.
-Yes! I have an incredible husband
-Yes! I have wonderful friends to count on and make me laugh
-Yes! My family is amazing and they're always there for me
-Yes! I have a job and because of it I can live a life I LOVE
-Yes! I have diseases and problems but they've made me such a better person, and I've met some incredible people because of them!

Anyway, I'm not saying that I'm talking about any of you in particular, but I hope you all live your lives that way too. No one wants to live in a world where everything is against them. I'm also not saying you can never have a hard time. Every now and then I'll have a day where I just need to deal with what's going on and cry, but those days are rare, and when they're done they're done. :)

If you all could take a minute to PLEASE watch this video clip (the link is below titled Nick Vujicic), I would appreciate it. Here is a guy who has a lot to be mad about, but he is incredibly happy and he loves his life. I've actually met him twice before, I've cried every time I've heard him speak and he's just great. Hope you enjoy! Love you all! Until next time!

Nick Vujicic

79.

2010-10-27T08:47:00.001-05:00

HEY EVERYONE! How are y'all doing? It's day 3/61 and I'm doing fantastic! Weight loss is goin GREAT (actually, it's right where I wanted to be so thats awesome)! Very excited about that! I'm having fun on my little crunch time adventure! haha

Also T-Tapp is going strong! It's my 3rd day in a row and I was actually worried about it! The third day is supposed to be the hardest, and the fourth is when it begins to get easier. (actually, they say the third day is when people quit haha) So I was expecting today to be difficult, but it was actually much easier! I had to count in my head a couple times how many days I'd done it haha!

Anyway, so far so good and I'm quite excited! Thanks all for the support! You guys are wonderful.

OH! Completely unrelated, have you guys heard the new Taylor Swift album? It's seriously so good! I've always loved her, but this latest one is ten times better than her other stuff. You guys should check it out!

Okay well have a great couple days! Until next time!

78.

2010-10-25T15:42:00.000-05:00

Well well well, Happy Monday everyone! How did your weekend go? Mine was fabulous! Loved seeing my friend, and my husband spoiled us all weekend long! He cooked, made our margaritas, drove us wherever we wanted, did grocery runs for us, and he's just wonderful!

So today starts Day 1 of Crunch Time! I'm so excited, and I'm ready to go! I feel like the hardest part is doing T-Tapp 6 days in a row though! So encouragement would definitely help! After these first 6 days, I only have to do it every other day, (how nice is that?!) As you know I'm no longer telling you my weight, but I do need to say I'm exactly where I wanted to be today! So that's good! Anyway hope you all have a wonderful day! until next time! :)

77.

2010-10-22T12:44:00.002-05:00

IT'S FINALLY FRIDAY, I'M FREE AGAIN!!! Well hello everyone! hope you all enjoyed your weeks, because it's the weekenddd :) Okay lots going on in the blog today, things are about to change with the blogging. But first of all let me say that today I am 296.1, kinda going slowly but I've been pretty stressed this week and not focusing on my diet. Thankfully all the craziness of this week is done as of this morning when I left for work, and this weekend will be WONDERFUL! My best friend is flying in today and I can't wait to see her, she was my maid of honor at my wedding, and sadly that's the last time I saw her! (she's in California) so this is a much needed weekend for us, so much has happened to both of us since we last saw each other and it just got to the point where we needed each others company. So she's coming today, I'm picking her up from the airport after work and we're going to relax, get our nails done, have some margaritas (thanks to my hubby!) and I'll tell ya, I can't wait! She is leaving on Monday, and Monday is when EVERYTHING changes.

Monday -Sunday technically- is exactly two months before the honey and I go to Cali for Christmas, and so this means it's crunch time! I'm going to give 150% to the Thyroid Diet and T-Tapp work out over the next two months, and I'm HOPING things will kick off like they did when I first started the diet! My mom came to visit me at the beginning of July, and that's when I was at 280-ish (43 lbs lighter than the last time she'd seen me) and when she was coming down that escalator her jaw dropped -literally-. Well the rest of my family hasn't seen me since I was 323, and I know I'll still wow them, but I want to "wow" my mom again too! As all you know though, I've gained some weight back since then. So I need to get PAST 280 (and yes I have a certain weight I'm shooting for, but I'm not going to say) in 2 months. I'm really really hoping I can do this, because I want to see that look on their faces!

So about not telling you the weight, and here's the "blog change" I will not be telling you all how much I weigh, or how much I've lost over the next two months. I will still be blogging, but all I will say in terms of my weight loss is I'm doing good, or doing bad. My family reads my blog, and I don't want them to have any idea of what I weigh when I show up, I want it to be a surprise, I hope you can all understand that. If I see that I am doing horrible at this, and am staying the same or gaining, then I will go back to my regular blogness.Hopefully that won't happen though! SO after my family sees me I will let all of you know exactly how I did, and I promise to post a picture! Thanks to all for your support.

So as I said I am 296.1 right now and I have XX lbs to lose in two months! Let's go ME!

76.

2010-10-20T15:15:00.000-05:00

Half way through the weeeeeek! :) Happy Wednesday everyone! Hope you are all well! I have lost .4 pounds since Monday, I am 196.6! As I said this week is crazy, but this morning was absolutely wonderful! My Dad sent me an email about some of his grapes (from his company) that are in Austin! I was freaking out because my Dad has the BEST grapes in the world, and I haven't had them in years because I don't live near them anymore (he used to bring cases home all the time) so I went on a hunt to look for the store I had never even seen! and I found them! It may sound dumb, but I was so excited and I seriously wanted to cry! They made me feel closer to home, and to have something of my Dad's near me was just so exciting for me. Oh if you don't know, my family is in California, I'm in Texas. So anyway I bought some grapes, they've been on my desk and we've been eating them :) I've been smiling ever since I walked into the store!

Anyway just wanted to share that with you, it made my whole week! haha Have a great day! Until next time :)

75.

2010-10-18T15:29:00.000-05:00

HAPPY MONDAY! I hope you all had a good weekend! Mine was good, crazy and busy but good! Before I forget, in case you've never heard about T-Tapp, or don't know enough about it here's the link! T-Tapp Website! Hope that helps and definitely check it out! There are lots of DVDs to choose from, but as long as the Basic Workout is in the DVD then that's what you need! I did gain a little bit of weight this weekend, and honestly I'm not sure why because I ate great! But I went up .6 pounds back to 297.0 this morning. I didn't have a "sweet treat" at all this weekend, but I did have a little thing of nachos Friday night (those $.89 ones from Taco Bell) so I don't know what happened. Oh well just going to keep pushing through!

This week my posts might not be as long as usual, I am incredibly busy this week, next week they'll be back to normal! Have a great day! Until next time :)

74.

2010-10-15T08:38:00.000-05:00

HAPPY FRIDAYYYY! I'm so excited for this weekend! My husband usually works Friday nights but tonight he isn't so I get to spend it with him! And then this weekend will be a mix of hanging with friends, hanging with my husband, and then hanging with them at the same time :) It should be fun! What do all of you have going on?
So I had lost 4 pounds by Wednesday, and since then I've lost another .6 pounds, so 4.6 pounds since Monday! That's pretty fun! (I weigh 296.4 now!) Please pray for me with my control during my "treat" this weekend. I'm already craving a lot and my husband is helping me say no to things so I hope I do well when treat comes!
As you remember I tore a lateral ligament in my knee during the T-Tapp retreat last weekend, I was told to do the rehab moves for a week or so before I go back to working out (don't worry I haven't been a total couch potato, I've been doing intense cleaning in our apartment every day this week for about 3 hours a day - our apartment isn't really dirty, we're doing a "spring cleaning" type of thing haha) BUT on Sunday I'm starting T-Tapp again! I'm going to do 6 days straight, and then every other day after that. Anyone else going to start too? I'm excited to get back into it, it was so fun last weekend! Anyway I hope you all have a great next few days! Until next time :)

73.

2010-10-13T08:32:00.000-05:00

IT'S WEDNESDAY!!! We're halfway through the work week and I can't wait for this weekend because I didn't get to spend last weekend with my hubby! How are all of you doing? I hope well! So I started the thyroid diet last week when I went to T-Tapp, but they had us eating more carbs and starchy foods along with desserts because of all the calories we were burning. So technically I started the Thyroid Diet on Monday morning. As I said on Monday I weighed 301.0 pounds. This morning I weighed 297.0 pounds! I've lost 4 pounds in 2 days and I am thrilled! I LOVE the Thyroid Diet, I LOVE the way I feel on it, and I LOVE looking at that scale and seeing it go down.

You know what's crazy? When I was at my lowest so far on the Thyroid Diet (277) I was standing straighter, smiling bigger, and loving myself more. Gaining 24 pounds really showed me how weight makes me feel. I wanted to hide behind my husband when we were out, I didn't want people looking at me and I definitely didn't love myself. The T-Tapp Retreat helped me love myself no matter what, but I can still tell I'm not standing as straight as I used to. So I'm going to be working on that, because even if I am morbidly obese, people don't need to see me looking frumpy, I don't need to see my looking frumpy! So that will be something I'm working on, showing my best at all times :) Anyway! I hope you all have a great next couple days, until next time!

72.

2010-10-11T09:52:00.000-05:00

OH MY GOODNESS! That had to have been the longest post I have ever written and it just got completely deleted! NNNOOOOOO! Okay this one won't be nearly as long or awesome but here we go ;-)

HAPPY MONDAY EVERYONE!!! I hope you all had fabulous weekends! I sure did! The retreat was more than amazing. Having Teresa break down the work outs move by move, the trainers helping you with your stance, and the huge family of T-Tappers all supporting you was incredible! The speakers were great, and I learned a lot! I ended up tearing a lateral ligament in my left knee so I was only able to do the first day of work outs but I still lost 11.3 inches! I was so shocked especially because I thought I felt heavier! Which brings up another point, Teresa says the inches are what matter, not the pounds; so measure, don't weigh. And we met so many women who have lost so many inches and dress sizes that haven't budged on their weight and they look fantastic! But since I am on the Thyroid Diet as well as T-Tapping, I will continue to do both! Also, you should see these women who have been T-Tapping for any amount of time. Their breasts LITERALLY go UP (no more sagging), their butts go up and out (in a good way) and their faces get 10-15 years younger. I met a 40 year old woman I still think is 25. T-Tapp is incredible, and you don't have to work out for however long in a day. 15 minutes every other day is what works! You all should try it! I've added the DVD I have as well as Teresa's book, which I am in the process of reading! When I hurt my knee Teresa gave me a rehab move (you can hardly call it a move, I'm just standing there) and I started doing it immediately. NO JOKE: I tore the ligament Friday night, Sunday morning I was pain free. Incredible! I even did a few work out moves this morning!

As for the Thyroid Diet, I am SO HAPPY to be back on it. I feel better about myself, and it just feels good! A big thanks to Diane who said she was starting back up with me on Thursday! (And of course everyone else who started up too!) It's not too late to start (or re-start) on your journey, start today! Thank you everyone for the encouragement and support, you and Mary have helped me so much! OH YEAH! I got to meet our fabulous Mary Shomon! She's amazing and we had a blast! I hadn't weighed myself but I told her that I thought I had gained 20 pounds since I found out I was pregnant and she says, "Why are you embarrassed? you shouldn't be!" She helped me be okay with what I had done in my healing process of the miscarriage, and actually I hadn't gained 20 pounds, I gained 24. I weigh 301, which is a little upsetting being back in the 300s but I'm going to do this! I'm IN the process of doing this! So it's not letting me get really down. I want to thank ALL of you for being there for me! You are all amazing! Have a wonderful day, until next time :)

71.

2010-10-06T09:24:00.000-05:00

HELLO EVERYONE! We're half way through the work week! Thankfully it's my Friday since I am leaving early tomorrow morning for the TTapp retreat! I'm very excited for this weekend, I need it so badly! I can't wait to learn new things about TTapp and get my act together with the Thyroid Diet.

Okay so as you know I was gaining weight while I was pregnant, not a shocker, I had to eat about 600 extra calories a day and I had to stop working out completely, the morning of my D&C they weighed me of course and I was 286. So I ended up gaining almost 10 pounds in just those two short weeks! I had still been eating things that were Thyroid Diet friendly, but unfortunately pregnancy and me equals weight gain apparently! (actually...it kinda makes sense now, the women in my family start gaining weight really fast when they're preggo, and they don't have thyroid problems...)

So here's my problem...after the D&C I just let myself go. I have been eating whatever I wanted the last week and a half and of course I'm still not working out. I finally got the okay on Friday, but I haven't yet. I'm very embarrassed and ashamed to say this (seriously my body is shaking as I'm typing this because I'm so frustrated with myself, and I would really rather not tell you all this. I'd rather you think I'm amazing and kept myself in control.). But I need to be honest with you guys. I actually haven't weighed myself since the D&C, but they are weighing and measuring me tomorrow at TTapp.

I honestly can't wait to start getting my life back on track, back on the Thyroid Diet and back to working out. My husband even told me that I'm happier when I'm on the Thyroid Diet, and he's right I am. So anyway. I'm very sorry if I have disappointed any of you, I hope you can all forgive me, I'm still in the process of trying to forgive myself! Well tomorrow starts my first day back on everything...HERE WE GO! Does anyone want to start with me tomorrow? I would love it if someone else did this with me. Start tomorrow! You can do it and so can I! Even if you aren't doing the Thyroid Diet, but you're doing another diet you love...DO IT! We can all do it together! Keep me posted. When I get back from my trip I will have another post, and I will tell you how everything went (including how much I weighed) :( Love you all! Have a wonderful weekend!

70.

2010-09-30T10:05:00.000-05:00

Thank you everyone for the love and prayers :) You are all truly wonderful. I realized this morning that I am finally okay and at peace with the miscarriage. I am in no way over what happened, there is no way to ever get over something like that. But I'm okay. I actually got my butt up and cleaned the house this morning and am in the process of doing laundry. I need to give a big thank you to my husband. He is so amazing and took such good care of me, he did more than I would have ever asked for. And thank you to you guys for being so patient with me while I get my life back together!

SO it's Thursday yay for almost Friday! This weekend should be good for me! I'm getting my hair trimmed and prettied up for the first time since the beginning of this year! (yikes!) and I'm going to get my hair dyed for the first time in almost a year and a half! (no bueno, I have so much gray and I'm usually good about hiding it, but there's no hiding it now haha) I believe we're doing something with the in-laws and I have a little bit of shopping to do!

I have a question for y'all, is anyone here going to the TTapp Retreat next week? Let me know I'll be there and I can't wait. I've been out of working out ever since I found out I was pregnant (and I'm still not allowed to yet, will find out more from Dr tomorrow.) and I'm ready to get back on track with my weight loss. Love all of you! Have a great weekend :) Until next time

69.

2010-09-23T13:47:00.000-05:00

Hey everyone, I just found out I've had a miscarriage, I'm having a DNC tomorrow. Please keep my husband and I in your prayers. After everything is done with the surgery and I'm back up and around I will continue on my Thyroid Diet journey. but for right now I need some time. Expect a new post next week sometime. Love you all. until then.

68.

2010-09-20T08:35:00.000-05:00

HAPPY MONDAY! I now look forward to Monday's because it means I'm in a new week of my pregnancy! I'm now 6 weeks pregnant and incredibly excited!!! The heartbeat starts appearing today, and the embryo starts appearing on Thursday (or is it Wednesday.....?) anyway just in time for the sonogram on Thursday morning!

This week a lot happens, the chin, jaw, eyes and ears start to take form (well the ears are just little holes and the eyes are little black dots right now but still.) Plus lots more! So exciting and so dang fun! Right now I feel great, going to the bathroom all the time but I feel really good :)

On a completely other note, Biggest Loser starts tomorrow night! WOO! I cry pretty much every episode...I'm kinda nervous to see how much I'll cry with all these crazy hormones going through me! haha!

How are all of you doing? Hope you're well and I hope you have an amazing week! Until next time :)

67.

2010-09-16T09:27:00.001-05:00

So I'm kinda bummed...I just wrote this whole long post...and accidentally deleted it when I was trying to save it...it's no where, I tried to bring it back....LET'S TRY THIS AGAIN! haha (this one will probably be shorter)

I got my books yesterday! I was so excited I already read everything I can read so far! (We aren't going farther than where I am in the pregnancy, that way it can all be as it's happening) The books are great! There were parts that I already knew, and others that answered questions I'd been saving up until I see my Dr again so that was fun!

So I haven't been weighing since I found out I was pregnant, but my mom said it was a good idea to keep track of where I am so I did and I've gained 2 pounds I weigh 279.5. Honestly I'm not surprised, I was hardly losing any weight if you all remember, and now I've added an additional 400 calories a day, I knew it would happen. The baby books say to eat 2200 calories a day during the first trimester, and right now I'm only eating 1600 but I think that's okay for right now, since it is more than I was eating before, and I'm definitely not letting myself starve or anything like that. I'm still eating everything that I was eating before on the diet, just obviously adding in some more.

The books also give some light exercises you can do, but I'm not doing anything right now for exercise. I was going to go bowling last weekend and I called my Dr to see if that was okay. She said because of my thyroid problems, being overweight, and having my last pregnancy end in a miscarriage she didn't want me to exercise or strain myself for now, until she gives the okay. (so obviously no...don't go bowling) She said to take it easy, and even don't go up and down the stairs at my apartment unless it's completely necessary. (I live on the third floor, and at work my office is on the second floor, no elevators either place) But I'm not being a total couch potato either, my bladder wouldn't exactly allow it anyway. I go to the bathroom about every half hour, but when I'm at home if we're watching TV, I get up and walk around the apartment during every commercial, and at work I get up and walk around the top floor every time after I go to the bathroom.

So I'm 5 weeks and 3 days pregnant, which means the yolk sac starts appearing today! Sounds gross but that's okay because things are happening, and on Monday the heartbeat starts appearing! SO excited! My Sonogram is a week from today and I can't wait I'm practically bouncing! OH OH ALSO! The day of the Sonogram is the first day of Fall my FAVORITE season, and my friend just told me a Fall Front is coming in on that day :) How perfect for the sonogram!!! Anyway totally thrilled! That's all for now, hope you all are doing well! Until next time :)

66.

2010-09-13T09:12:00.000-05:00

Happy Monday everyone! I am now 5 weeks pregnant! YAY! I'm incredibly excited I can't even tell you guys! We have our first Sonogram 10 days from now, and I feel like that is forever away! I'm so excited I want to have it now, which of course, I know we won't be able to see anything right now, but still. I have so many friends that have gone through pregnancies and have children now. I remember how they were always so anxious for their next appointment, or for their due date. Now, I've only known for 6 days and I'm practically bouncing waiting for the 23rd to come! Guess I'm going to have to learn some patience. Haha! I can't remember if I told y'all last week, but my oldest sister is pregnant as well! I'm so excited to be pregnant with one of my sisters, it is so fun! :)

I also just bought some baby books! They should be here any day now and I can't wait to start reading them! My sister strongly recommended "Your Pregnancy Week by Week." She said "What to Expect When You're Expecting" is a great book but since it's Month by Month you need something else to read and fill your mind with, which is why the first book is so great!

I'm doing really well with eating, still eating very healthy, just adding more food to my diet so I can get some more calories in. I'm eating a ton of protein and making sure I get everything the baby needs! Anyway, that's all I have for now! Hope you all have a wonderful day! Until next time :)

65.

2010-09-08T12:37:00.000-05:00

Hello everyone! Okay so I have some major news! First of all, I decided this week that I wasn't going to weigh myself. I could tell that every time I got on the scale and it was barely lower I would get frustrated. I had to realize that my body is amazing, and she is doing the best she can. I knew I wouldn't be able to get on the scale this week and maintain my loving outlook towards my body so I decided NO scale this week.

THEN, just last night I took a test and guess what....I'm pregnant! I'm so thrilled, and even though the hubby is in shock he's excited too :) We weren't planning on it, and I took my birth control every day, it's just what God wanted for us. The craziest part is, I got pregnant exactly one year after my miscarriage...isn't God funny? So this is my second time being pregnant and we're praying for the absolute best! Please keep all three of us in your prayers :)

So now since I'm pregnant, I'm not going to try to lose anymore weight, I'm just going to try not to gain very much weight since I'm already big enough for the baby. I'm not going off the Thyroid Diet, but I am eating a few more calories here and there (since my OBGYN said I wasn't eating nearly enough) but they will be good snacks filled with protein (i.e. String cheese wrapped in a slice of ham...yum!)

I will keep up my blog, but it is going to expand to my pregnancy and other things as well. Hope you all have a great week! Until next time :)

64.

2010-09-03T08:43:00.000-05:00

YAY FRIDAY! I'm so so so so happy that you're here finally :) AND! It's a three day weekend! Can't get much better than that, I usually don't get the holidays off, but this time I DO! One of the other girls wanted to work so yay, I get the day with my wonderful husband! What do all of you have planned this weekend?

Okay, so I don't know if I forgot to weigh yesterday, or if I did weigh and I just didn't lose weight on Wednesday; but today I weigh 277.4! YAY! So either I lost .2 pounds yesterday, or over the last two days. Either way I'm happy! Slowly getting to the 277.0 mark and hopefully going past it!

So Wednesday, I don't know why I forgot to put this in my post but oh well, I got hurt working out! Oh no! I was doing TTapp, and there was this part where you do plies (sp?) and my left knee just went CRACK! It was so painful and my husband had to help me back onto the couch. I'm doing better now, I can walk mostly but I live on the third floor, and my office is on the second floor (and some of my things I have to do are on the first floor) there are no elevators at either place. When I go up or down the stairs my knee really starts killing me again, but I think I'm getting better. So I didn't do TTapp today (I do it every other day) but yesterday and today I've been lifting light weights and working out my arms.

Okay it's FABULOUS FRIDAY. This morning I couldn't have woken up any better way. The hubbs and I woke up, we laid in bed cuddling and talking for a few minutes before getting up and that's always my favorite. Then I look out the window to find it's pouring rain! Another favorite! I think the world looks the most beautiful when there are dark clouds in the sky and it is raining :) It is also exactly three months and three weeks until I get to see my entire family! I can't wait. Nothing can put me in a bad mood today...um...*knock on wood* ahem. HOPEFULLY nothing bad happens today ;-) What's so fabulous about your day?

Well I hope you have an amazing weekend! I will try my hardest to remember to post on Monday! (it's so hard when I don't have to go to work to remember it's a week day!) Until next time :)

63.

2010-09-01T13:48:00.000-05:00

HAPPY WEDNESDAY! Once again, I must say sorry for not writing on Monday. Once again I wasn't at work, but I was practically in the car from 6.45a-2.30p when I got home and fell asleep. So I'm so sorry! I hope you are all amazing, how were your weekends? Mine was nice, but kind of crazy! My hubby and his work partner were working off duty at a football game, so his work partner's girl and I decided to go watch the game; I didn't get home until midnight. (Okay just so you all know...I may be 21, but my husband (22) and I are almost always in bed by 9:30p...) Then Saturday morning I had to get up bright and early to help a friend get somewhere and baby sit for her, I didn't get home until about 4p. Then I took a shower and got ready for date night with the hubbs, and might I say it was the best one we've had in a while. Food was good (fajitas-no tortillas, rice or beans, and shared his fries) and conversation was so nice :) After, we went and bought a few movies came home got on the couch and proceeded to watch two of them. We were trying to pull an all nighter, but at midnight we kinda looked at each other and yawned "Bed?" so that didn't work out so well! Sunday we slept in til 10.30a (yay! we're normally up by 7:15a) did laundry, grocery shopping and such but I wasn't feeling well. I just had NO energy, I know you all know how that feels, so I took it easy the rest of the day.
That was my weekend :) OH! AND GUESS WHAT! I lost .1 pounds over the weekend!!! WOOO! Since Monday, I've lost an addition .2 pounds! I'm at 277.6 (darn that 277....) but I know my time is coming. I'm working extra hard, and one of these days my body is going to be like WHOA! Hey guess we're actually supposed to be doing something here! Then I'll have big news and numbers to put up here. Anyway, I hope you all have a wonderful day! Until next time :)

62.

2010-08-27T11:24:00.000-05:00

Happy Friday! The work week is over...in a few hours :) and I'm so excited! Do you all have any special plans this weekend? We don't, well not that I know of. I know we'll have our date but other than that it should be pretty relaxing :) I did not lose any weight on Wednesday, but I did lose .2 pounds yesterday! I am 277.9! I'm really hoping to lose, or at least not gain, any weight this weekend. I'm ready to be done with these numbers , come on body! Let's get to 275 and below!
I am still doing TTapp every other day, and just added doing light weights for my arms. I know some people have said to change up the work outs, but when you're doing TTapp, you're only supposed to do TTapp. It said you may do light walking if you want...but it's 100+ degrees here....no thanks.
How are you doing with your diets? healthy eating? or just living with your thyroid problems? Let me know and have a great weekend!

Until next time :)

61.

2010-08-25T13:31:00.000-05:00

AHH HAPPY WEDNESDAY! I hope these next three days FLY by for everyone. Okay I have to apologize, so Monday I didn't go to work and not being at work left me thinking it was Sunday! So I didn't write a post, and decided to skip it all together until today. Sorry if you were wondering where I disappeared to, but I'm back!
I had a wonderful 2nd Anniversary with the hubbs! He is just too sweet, he took me out to lunch at BJ's (I didn't understand until then why he wouldn't let me eat my treat all weekend. haha) and later we went and saw The Other Guys, let me tell you that movie was funny. So thanks to everyone who wished us well, it was wonderful :)
Also! Thanks for all the positive feedback for Thankful Friday (seriously, I'm going to think of a new name) I'm glad you all enjoyed it, and I just want to let you all know I don't think I'm amazing because I was able to find the bright side of things, it took me YEARS to find it. Trust me I love to throw pity parties for myself (and I still do every now and then) but life is so much easier and happier when you have an optimistic view of it. So that's how I live my life...I've kind of always been like that though. You know those bubbly people who smile a lot and get kind of annoying because they're always really happy (that is SO me.)
Okay weight loss news......I didn't gain ANY weight this weekend! WOO! But I didn't lose either haha. Since Friday though I have lost .3 pounds, I am at 278.1, it's still going down, that's all I'm happy about. I got some really good tips on how to jump off the plateau and I just began doing them Tuesday, so hopefully we see some big results soon!
How are all of you doing? Love to hear from you! Hope you're having an amazing day! Until next time :)

60.

2010-08-20T12:45:00.000-05:00

IT'S THANKFUL FRIDAY! okay...so maybe thankful Thursday works so much better; but I don't write posts on Thursday.....so there. Haha! Well happy Friday everyone, we made it through another wonderful week, and it's one week closer to Fall/Winter! Yay :) I am 278.4 pounds right now, so I've lost another .3 pounds since Wednesday...slow...very slow. But I'm okay with that. It's such a relief when you're losing, no matter how much; when all you are familiar with is gaining huge amounts...am I right? My husband and I have our two year Anniversary this coming Monday, so I'm sure we're celebrating it this weekend and some point and I'm very excited :) These last two years have flown by, and I'm excited to see what happens from here! What do you have going on this weekend?

Okay so Thankful Friday: (This is only somewhat blog/weight loss related) Okay, so just a small background on me first: I grew up in California and always said, "I'm not going to end up here!" haha well I'm in Texas now, so I guess I was right! But my family is all in California, and even though we've seen each other a lot the last couple of years; it's really hard sometimes. My parents are the most amazing parents and couple you'll ever meet, and ever since I left for college five years ago my Mom and I have become really close friends. I talk to her every day, sometimes four times a day (I'm amazing at forgetting what I called her to talk about...so I just keep calling. Haha!) and she is the only person I know who understands everything I'm going through. I was really lucky that she was a stay at home Mom, because she was able to take me to every single Dr appointment I had, so she was there for the emotional news and lab results to help me through it all. As for my Dad, nothing can put a smile on my face like he can. I am such a Daddy's girl, and he's always been there to help me understand the good in every situation. Also, thanks to them for changing church's and leading my family to Christ, without that change I would definitely not be where I am today. I also have two older sisters, both have two little kids and the oldest is pregnant again! :) We fought a lot growing up (like all sisters close in age do haha), but I don't know what I'd do without them now, they're amazing and very important in my life. Unfortunately, moving away has led me to not even meet my youngest nephew yet, and he's almost a year old. So as you can tell, my family and I are really close, and I love and miss them dearly. (that was all the background haha)
Today I was driving to work and thinking about the picture of my niece and youngest nephew my sister sent me yesterday, and how I felt like I was missing out; but then it hit me...Texas is where I need to be. First of all, I love it here (take away the heat and it would be perfect haha) second, my husband is here; and I'd follow him anywhere. Also, my Endocrinologist here in Austin, is the best one I've seen in the last 10 years. If my cousin here, who was a size 0 even when she was 9 months pregnant, hadn't wanted to go to the mall; I would have never found the Thyroid diet. Well, maybe I would have eventually somehow. But if I wasn't in Texas, I would have never started my blog so my family could see how I was doing; and none of the things happening in my life through this blog would be happening.

Okay that was really long...but this is basically what I'm getting at.
We all have Thyroid problems, and most of us have weight problems because of it. I left my family to be here in Texas with my amazing husband. But without the thyroid/ weight problems, and without being away from my family, the amazing things going on in my life through this blog wouldn't have ever happened.
A lot of times crappy situations can seem like the biggest and only thing going on in your life. I love when God shows me how even the worst times, are also the best for my life; and it drastically changes my perspective on everything going on.
SO for Thankful Friday:
-I am very thankful for the diseases/illnesses I've had in my life. It has made me a stronger person.
-I am very thankful for gaining so much weight. I was a really mean person growing up, especially to overweight people. Gaining weight changed me for the better.
-I am very thankful for my move to Texas. I miss my family horribly, but Texas was the best decision I could have made.
-I am very thankful for all the support I have. All of you reading my blog, my family in California, and my husband and cousin here in Texas. I wouldn't be able to do any of this without you guys :)

OKAY! That was a long post. Thankful Friday done :) Until next time.

59.

2010-08-18T08:37:00.000-05:00

It's half way to Fridaayyyyy :) How are y'all doing this fine day? It's supposed to storm today so I'm getting all excited! Okay since Monday, I have lost .5 lbs, isn't a lot but at least it's down right? I'm doing extremely well on my diet, and I added up all of my calories yesterday and I'm eating 1100! Yay me! Okay so I've been noticing the last two months that I can eat any amount of food, it doesn't matter if it's a couple bites or a huge meal that leaves me unable to move. I will be incredibly hungry within the next 10-15 minutes. (It is not me wanting more food, my stomach will begin growling and it feels like I haven't eaten in the last day.) So I'm not really eating a lot more, I'm eating my same foods, just smaller and more often. I also added a little more with the foods I'm already eating, making sure I get all my fats in and that's how I've been able to add more calories! So it's worked really well the last two days, and hopefully it will continue to do so! I'm not having any cravings for other foods which is really great since they're covering our kitchen! And I don't know I just feel really great right now :) How are you guys? What's going on with all of you?

58.

2010-08-16T10:00:00.000-05:00

Happy Monday! :) I think we should all decide right now that this week is going to be amazing! How did your weekends go? Mine was a lot of fun! But weird, and EXTREMELY helpful to me with my diet. It's going to be hard to explain, just keep in mind that I'm a little weird with the ways I get ready for certain things and that it was very beneficial for me on the Thyroid Diet. So I got my motivation back two weeks ago, and then I got really sick so I was on soup and bananas only, and then once I was feeling better I started my time of the month again (rolls eyes) and my cravings were through the roof! I mean, worse than I've had in a very long time. Every day I was craving chocolate so much I seriously started to cry, it was ridiculous. As the weekend started getting closer my cravings for other foods started getting worse, I haven't craved foods off the diet this bad at all in the last four months. Now, there's something you need to know about me... If I want something....I want it now. So here's what I did. Friday night (which I surprisingly still lost weight after) Saturday and Sunday, I let myself eat whatever I wanted. I only ate when I was hungry, but I had fries (Fri), chips, salsa and tortillas with my fajitas (Sat), a cookie (Sat), two slices of pizza (Sun) and split a small piece of cake with my hubby (Sun) this weekend. With eating all of that I had a bunch of different feelings: 1. I do not want those foods anymore, because I don't like the way they make me feel 2. I bet I'm going to have gained 4 pounds when I get on the scale Monday 3. This is exactly what I needed.

See when I started the Thyroid Diet, my "treats" on the weekend was a cup of frozen yogurt, and sharing a plate a french fries with the hubbs; and even when that was it, I still felt like it was too much the majority of the time. Over the last month I have been eating more and more and craving more and more on the weekends. Now after this weekend of careless eating, I know that when the next weekend comes up (and many after that) I'm not going to be wanting those things anymore. I'm -mentally- back where I was at the beginning of the Thyroid Diet, and that's what I've been trying to do! I can feel it, and I'm already seeing it in how I view foods. I baked a cake for the husband yesterday (that was the piece I shared) and of course the rest of it is sitting on the counter. When we were cleaning up last night I was thinking, that's going to be hard having there this next week. But this morning I woke up, worked out, weighed and went to the kitchen to get breakfast and guess what! I gagged when I saw the cake! We also have soups, crackers, pasta and many other things that I love in the house and I can't imagine forcing those foods down my throat. I'm so excited this is what I've been trying to get at for the last three weeks! :) Oh and also, I didn't gain 4 pounds; but from Friday (278.2) I gained exactly 1 pound. This morning I weighed 279.2, normally I would be really annoyed with that, but let me tell you I am THRILLED! Because I can't wait to shake it off, and I can't wait for next weekend to come when I know I won't be worried about gaining weight.

So like I said, it's weird but so awesome for me. I can't wait to see where this takes me with the thyroid diet and how the weight comes off. Oh also! I'm going to be eating more calories, I was eating around 600 and starting today I will be back between 1000 and 1200 every day. I think the small amount I've been eating has also been really bad for me, and my body has been holding on to every little thing I've put in my mouth. So hopefully eating a little bit more will change everything! Okay, well this is long enough and I'm sure it's a little confusing haha! I hope you guys had a great weekend, and that you have a great day! Until next time :)

57.

2010-08-13T08:44:00.000-05:00

HAPPY FRIDAY!!! I am so excited it is actually here! I woke up yesterday thinking it was Saturday, and when I finally realized it wasn't, I thought it was Friday all day. Haha I hate those kind of weeks! Okay well it's Friday now and I'm excited :) Thank you all for your feedback, I really needed it :) And I appreciate the suggestions! I've lost an additional .3 lbs since Wednesday so I'm 278.2 now. It's frustrating because it's going SO slow lately, but I'm waiting for something to jump past this point while still using the Thyroid Diet. This diet works really well for me and I want to keep with it. A few people have said that I might not be eating enough each day, and I think they're right. There are some days where I only eat 600 calories, and with TTapp and going up and down stairs at work and home I really don't think that's enough. So I'm slowly trying to incorporate more calories each day, at the beginning of the Thyroid Diet I was eating anywhere from 1000-1200 calories a day, and i want to get back up there without jumping back up there. Does that make sense, or does that seem just weird? Anyway, so I'm going to try to change my food plan again and get some new things, and more things this weekend at the store! We'll see how next week goes, hopefully there is more weight loss than this week. ;-)

What do you have going on this weekend? We have a party tomorrow with my hubby's co-workers so that should be fun and then Sunday is my parent's Anniversary :) They're the best and I hope they have a great weekend Love you guys! Alright you all have a great weekend, until next time ;-)

56.

2010-08-11T14:26:00.000-05:00

Happy Wednesday everyone! Halfway through the work week, it's all down hill from here! Okay, so I've lost .5 pounds since Monday and I'm at 278.5 right now :) Yay! Things are still going really slow right now, but I'm working hard to get past this point. I've gotten motivated all over again, but there still isn't a lot happening, does anyone have any other ideas? Also, since there isn't a lot going on, I was considering going down to only 1-2 posts a week? Maybe until things start picking up? What do you guys think? I could really use some suggestions and thoughts right now! I hope you are all doing amazing, and I really hope to get past this point soon! I'm not happy staying here...I want to keep moving forward! So with all my motivation and the right foods there, what would you guys suggest to get a jump on things? I just need something, whatever it may be, that pushes me past this point and I know I'll be off again! Anyway, can't wait to hear from you! Have a great day :)

55.

2010-08-09T13:57:00.000-05:00

Happy Happy Monday! I hope you all had amazing weekends! Mine was really busy. I was out with my cousin all day Saturday and then Sunday we did groceries and a little kids Birthday party. Okay now that I'm saying it, it really doesn't seem like I did a lot, but it was intense at the time haha! I'm sorry if this post isn't long or very interesting, I have not been getting any sleep lately and my eyes keep closing while I'm typing this! I'm just a liiiiiittle out of it :) So, I was 278.4 on Friday and I'm 279 this morning, so I gained a little bit of weight this weekend, but I'm ready to shed it off! (As soon as I sleep for more than 2 hours, haha) So I've been trying to do TTapp every day, and of course my muscles start getting tired, but I've been getting really intense pain in my legs. I know this is a symptom of Thyroid problems, so I'm really used to it (and who knows, I might have fibromyalgia) BUT it's as if I just ran up and down stairs for an hour, no matter what I'm doing. My legs are always shaking and it hurts to stand up on them, I feel like they're about to give out! Does anyone have any ideas for how to make it go away? Hope you all have a wonderful day :) Until next time!

54.

2010-08-06T12:20:00.000-05:00

ALRIGHT ALRIGHT IT'S FRIDAY! Yay :) I'm definitely ready for this weekend! Okay so I wrote my blog on Wednesday and you'll never guess. I threw up twice after that! I ended up having to leave work early again, and it just hasn't been fun! So since that started up again I've only been eating a banana and some soup the last couple days. (Obviously not on my diet, but I had to heal my body first...and my diet foods were definitely not helping my stomach!) I've still lost some weight though since Wednesday! :) I weigh 278.4 this morning, so I lost an addition .6 lbs. I'm really afraid to jinx anything...but I'm feeling pretty good this morning haha! And like I said on Wednesday, I'm hoping that now I can really get focused on my diet and losing weight. Hopefully this weekend/next week I'm just feeling amazing and I can blow past this 277-280 plateau! I always tell everyone who gets sick or anything like that to focus on your body and getting yourself better, don't worry if you have to eat things not on your diet for a few days. You'd rather take a few days to heal than just ruin your body right? So I'm taking my own advice and doing just that. Although I'm feeling better today, I'm still on soup. And, God willing, I hope to be back to my diet foods tomorrow! Thank you everyone SO SO much for the sweet words and thoughts about the hard time the hubbs and I just went through. You are all amazing :) I know I say that a lot...but you really are! You guys help me through so much and knowing you are standing there with me on this journey helps so so much!

Okay now this is definitely not thyroid/diet related but I had to give a little shout out to my niece Ava Marie :) My sister entered her in a Shirley Temple look-alike contest last night and she ended up winning! Ever since her hair started growing, we've always said she had that "curly top" and now that's she's almost 5 years old she definitely has that Shirley Temple look to her! Here are just two pictures of both of them, I think they are so dang cute! (And yes, I promise I got permission from my sis to post the pics, haha!)

Well anyway! I hope you all have a wonderful weekend! I'm looking forward to mine! Until next time :)

53.

2010-08-04T11:01:00.000-05:00

Happy Wednesday everyone! Hope you are all having a great week! Mine hasn't been the best so far :( I had to leave work early Monday because I felt awful; and I knew if I stayed that extra hour, I would not have been able to make it home! Not even an hour after I got home I was throwing up and had the worst migraine. I didn't sleep much that night and threw up a few times on Tuesday. (I definitely stayed home and on the couch yesterday) Then last night I wasn't able to go to sleep until 3am and had to wake up at 6! Grossssssss. To make yesterday even better it was exactly one year from when I had my miscarriage from my only pregnancy. I threw up again this morning, but am feeling mostly better and I'm going to work.

Wow! Okay, now that that's all out I'm hoping the rest of the week goes well! Hahah. I don't know if you all remember, I said in one of my previous posts about how I gain weight when I throw up, and I was thinking "NO! I just got all my motivation back!" I have lost a pound since Monday though, so that's really good! I can just feel that I'm doing really well, but I know getting sick had to have made it's mark these last couple days. Anyway so I'm now 279.0 again, I've been there so many times and I'm excited to get away from it. Now that I'm feeling better I can't wait to see how this new motivational kick goes :) How are you all doing? I hope well :) Well I gotta get going, so until next time!!

52.

2010-08-02T13:55:00.000-05:00

Happy Monday everyone! Hope you are all doing fabulous and had great weekends! Mine was good but definitely had a lot going on! So over the course of last week and especially this weekend, I found my motivation again :) Yay! But I'm also really weird about being motivated for diets. Once I hit that YEAH! LET'S DO THIS state of mind, I have to take 1-2 days of eating things that definitely will not be on my diet, or eating more than normal. I didn't over-do it this weekend; I just wasn't thinking about my diet at all! And as weird as that might sound, it helped me get so pumped for this morning! So I did gain 1 pound this weekend and am back at 280.0 but I'm not worried about it. I have a feeling this plateau is over starting today; so I'm sure that 280 is gonna peace out soon! I feel like this is the very first day of the Thyroid Diet, and that's really what I needed! I'm so excited!!! Actually, shopping with my size 0 and XS cousin AGAIN was what helped me get motivated. I was thinking, "I've lost over 40 pounds, but I can still only shop in two stores! I want to be able to shop in this store again!" And that's what did it! (For those of you new to my blog, shopping with her was what made me start the Thyroid Diet in the first place! haha) So I made a new menu, made a workout chart; and along with the goals I've always had, I made a bunch of small goals in between now and Christmas. And speaking of my menu, I don't post my menu on here, because I think everyone needs their own. No one has the same body/metabolism and so my menu can't work for everyone. And plus, not everyone likes the same foods. That's why Mary gives a list of foods to choose from. Also, there are three different types of the Thyroid Diet, so I might not be doing the one that is right for you. Anyway, I hope that makes sense. I just feel like the best thing to do, if you want to do the Thyroid Diet, is buy the book and make your own personalized menu off the list of foods Mary gives. Okay well I hope you all have a wonderful day! And I can't wait to see how this week goes and report it back to you guys! Thanks for the encouragement, I definitely needed it so much!! Until next time :)

51.

2010-07-30T14:15:00.000-05:00

HAPPY FRIDAY! Man I am so ready for this weekend. Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday I thought it was Thursday; and then today comes and I thought it was Saturday! OH my word it has been insane haha. So yesterday I weighed 279.0, and weighed that exact amount this morning as well. I've lost exactly 1 pound so far this week and I hope to lose weight or stay the same over this weekend. So my brand new pants were feeling a little tight yesterday and ESPECIALLY last night. I was thinking what is going on? I've lost weight since I bought these and I can't wait to get into pajamas. Then last night we got home from a friends house and I had started my period, AGAIN! It's so frustrating that this keeps happening, but at least I knew what was up with me feeling super bloated! I want to thank you all so much for your suggestions and thoughts. You guys are all so amazing and I am going to be putting all of that together. Your encouraging words mean more than you could possibly know and I'm glad to have you all right there with me! I'm writing up a whole new menu (NOT all the same foods every day haha) and going to the store probably tomorrow morning. So we'll see how this weekend goes, and next week especially! I hope you all have an amazing weekend, and thank you again! Until next time :)

50.

2010-07-28T12:14:00.000-05:00

HAPPY WEDNESDAY! Half way through the week yay :) It has been storming here in Texas, and right now it is POURING! I love it, this is my favorite weather, I can never be in a bad mood when it's raining! Oh my goodness I can't even believe I am on post 50. How insane is that?! Well thank you everyone for being there with me through it all! Okay I have lost .8 pounds since Monday and I am currently at 279.2, so at least I'm losing the only bummer is I was hoping to get to 276 this week and that is most definitely not happening! Okay I'm still on my diet and everything and I'm still wanting/needing to lose some major weight...but you know right before you start a diet and you get so much enthusiasm for it and for losing weight and you think, "Nothing can stop me!"?? Well I definitely had that the first two and a half months and I feel like I've lost that this last month. I am not giving up! PLEASE PLEASE realize I am NOT giving up. I have a life I need to take back, but I need to somehow find that drive again. I think that's why I've been messing up so much during these past few weekends. It's that stupid plateau everyone hits at least once during a big weight loss, I'm sure everyone's felt this before....right?? So what is it you guys do to re-motivate yourself? How do you just run and jump off that plateau? I just realized today that this is what has been going on, so I'm sure I won't have the answer by this evening, haha but I am definitely going to spend some time with the lights, computer, iPhone off. It's raining so it's perfect. I just want to sit in the dark hearing nothing but the rain and I want to think about what I want to do, and how I'm going to get there. I am still going to be doing the Thyroid Diet, and I'm going to continue to do the TTapp More DVD, just going to get my head and heart back in the game. If anyone has any suggestions PLEASE let me know! Encouragement is always very helpful too. You guys are all so amazing :) Have a great day! Until next time ;-)

49.

2010-07-26T14:18:00.000-05:00

Happy Monday everyone! I hope you all had amazing weekends! Mine was really really good! So Friday evening I come home with the hubbs and he says, "GET OVER THERE!" So I don't ask I just ran away from our door haha (I was figuring there was a wasp or something) but as I'm running I look up and I saw a black blob at the top of our door. Turns out it was a bat! EEK! I ended up naming him Squishy, my husband and another cop captured him and he was off to...somewhere? haha! Then Saturday I went shopping with my cousin and it was SO SO EXCITING! Okay when I started this diet I was wearing a 4X shirt, I bought three new 2X shirts!!!! and they fit very well :) Also, I started off wearing a size 22 pants (but I honestly think I was a 24, I had just fully stretched them out) and I am now the owner of a very comfy fitting size 20 pants! YAY!! I'm so excited :) Then Sunday we had lunch with my husband's parents and after he and I watched movies on our couch the rest of the day it was great! And our puppy was being so good! (Hubby bought her a HUGE...I mean HUGE chewing bone, this thing is about 3 ft long) So that bone has ended up to be the perfect baby sitter for her, haha! I do have some bad news and I'm very sorry for it...I blew it this weekend :( I had 3 meals off my diet, instead of my normal 1 meal and a dessert...and I ended up gaining 3 pounds over the weekend. I was 280.0 this morning. I'm really sorry if I disappointed anyone, I'm going to keep on going I promise! Have a wonderful day, until next time :)

48.

2010-07-23T11:44:00.000-05:00

Happy Friday! I'm super excited for this weekend and I hope you are all too! Okay so this morning I still weighed 277.0 :( But I'm hoping something will happen over the weekend or the beginning of next week! My husband gave me a challenge last night and I'm really excited about it and super pumped to try to accomplish it. Lose 20 pounds in 11 weeks...which goes for about 1.8 pounds a week! We'll see how it goes! So tell me...why are you guys dieting or trying to get your Thyroid levels in check? What is it that you want to do through this? As for me? I'm taking control of my life, I'm not going to live it how my Thyroid expects me too and also I want to be able to really enjoy myself, and have an amazing relationship with my hubby for years and years to come, and be there for my kids whenever we start trying to have them. I want to be able to keep up with them! In order to do that I need my levels to be at a normal range and I need to lose weight this lame disease threw on me! Can't wait to see your responses! Until next time :)

47.

2010-07-22T15:54:00.000-05:00

Hey everyone!! Okay I know it's Thursday but I had to write a new post. So I've been thinking lately about how my posts are so short, there isn't a lot in them, and my weight loss has slowed down; so I just wanted to let you all know that I'm definitely not giving up! I am seriously so committed to this and I want this for myself, for my relationship with my husband, and just to prove that people with Thyroid problems can take control of their lives! Right? Cause that's how we all feel isn't it? We feel completely out of control, we rely solely on our Doctors and we just let these Diseases rule our lives! I'm not saying to not rely on your Doctor's knowledge, definitely not, but you also need to rely on yourself and what your body is telling you! So I think I talked about my Reverse T3 levels last week, well anyway they are crazy high and my Endo said that with how high they are they can slow down weight loss. She barely changed my dose and said hopefully with that my weight loss will start picking up again. And I definitely hope it will! I'm at 277.0 and I was there almost 2 weeks ago too! I want to get into the 260s come on body! :) Anyway I really want to thank everyone who reads this blog for being there for me and with me through all of this. Please don't give up on me, I'm definitely going to push past this plateau! I'm sorry if the posts have gotten somewhat dull, I'm hoping to shake them up again! Also, only 14 lbs until I have accomplished my first Phase, and only 15 lbs to go until I post my second round of pictures.

For people who are just starting this blog, I hope you can read the first post on here (1.) it explains so much! And also, I have phases set up: Phase 1- go from Morbidly Obese to Obese. Phase 2- go from Obese to Overweight. Phase 3- Go from overweight to healthy. And wherever I find I'm happiest I'll stop there...I'm really hoping to get to 170 though! Also, I post new pictures of myself every 30 lbs I lose! The three pictures on the top of the blog are the skinniest I've been, the heaviest I've been and my first 30 lb loss picture which was 2 months ago. I hope you guys are all doing amazing, please let me know what's going on with you! I've been there, and if I haven't I can totally relate. If you don't want to share your story on here please find me on Facebook: Molly Jester or email me! molly.jester@hotmail.com Until next time :)

46.

2010-07-21T12:55:00.000-05:00

Hey everyone! We're half way through the work week yay :) On Tuesday I weighed 278.0, and I was thinking to myself...it's going to go a lot slower than I was hoping this week! But this morning I weighed 277.0 :) YAY!!!! I was seriously excited! I really hope I can lose 1 more pound by Friday! 277 is the lowest I have been so far, I hit it one day a week and a half ago but was 1.2 lbs heavier ever since. So I've lost 45 lbs and I still can't believe it. I really hope I can blow past this point, I always seem to lose a bit and then get stuck at the high end of a number, and then again at the low end (i.e. 281 & 288) and I stay there for a week or so and then I'll drop down to a different spot haha! Well I hope you are all doing amazing and thank you for the book comments I wrote them down and I will for sure keep them in mind! Hope you all have a wonderful day!! Until next time :)

45.

2010-07-19T13:33:00.000-05:00

HAPPY MONDAY EVERYONE! Hope you all had incredible weekends! Well this morning I was actually really sick and couldn't get off the couch but I forced myself to get moving and go to work and no joke...as SOON as I got in my office I felt incredible! I wish I were home because the mood I'm in the house would be spotless and the laundry would be done! Hahah, y'all ever get in those moods where you just keep going? LOVE that! Alright so I gained .2 lbs over the weekend I currently weigh 278.2 and I'm really hoping to reach 276 by Friday, so I'll keep you updated. I don't want to set big goals since I haven't been losing much lately, but I have a good feeling for this week so I'll go for a little over 2! How are you all feeling? Anything you want to share? I love hearing from you guys!!!

Hey one more question...if I were to write a book what would you guys want to hear in it? Would you even buy it? Haha hugs to everyone!!! And have a wonderful week :) Until next time!

44.

2010-07-16T09:41:00.000-05:00

Happy Friday! I weighed in this morning at 278.0, so I didn't lose as much as I wanted this week, but at least I lost at all! I had my Dr appointment with my Endo today, and it went pretty well! My T4 and T3 are normal, but on the high side of the normal range and my TSH is <.006. After finding out I've lost so much weight my Dr wasn't worried about the TSH level at all. She thinks the only reason it switched over to hyper was because of the big weight loss, which was my thought process too! I said I want to go really slow with the transition to get it to normal, and she said that was fine! (Because I'm afraid if we do a leap I'll start gaining weight again) So I'm going to continue to do a 275mcg Mon-Sat and then on Sunday I will only take 200mcg. So YAY! She was great, and I was really excited :) Anyway I hope you are all doing well and have a fabulous weekend! Until next time ;-)

43.

2010-07-14T11:12:00.000-05:00

Hey everyone! We're half way through the week! I weighed 278.4 this morning, it's going slow since Monday and that was really frustrating to me...but then I started my time of the month today so I feel much better knowing what's going on, and I know once a couple of days have passed that extra 1.4lbs will shed off! I'm hoping to be 277.0 on Friday morning so I hope all goes well with that! I have my Endo appt Friday morning so I'll wait until the afternoon to post my Friday blog so I can let you all know about it! I hope you are all doing well. And here's a little tip for those of you trying to diet. If you are seriously craving chocolate or something sweet and you don't want to use your treat for the week yet, try the new Jello Mousse! They are only 60 calories and you can just have it as a cheat treat, instead of fully counting it as a treat! Hope that helps! Have a great day, until next time ;-)

42.

2010-07-12T14:35:00.000-05:00

HEY EVERYONE! Happy Monday! Sorry I was MIA last week my mom was my special visitor and I don't get to see her very often! I had a blast with her, even though I did miss my hubby while he was out of town for a conference. So I did really well on my diet last week and I weighed 277 on Saturday! I was super excited but I tried not to get too excited since I was going to be having my treat that day. So Friday I wasn't feeling amazing...but I didn't feel sick, it was really weird! Saturday I was still feeling that way and every time I would eat it would get worse. Saturday night I started throwing up a lot and it scared me at first but then I realized I was throwing up everything I had eaten since Friday morning...none of it had digested. It was so weird...has this ever happened to any of you? I mean with the food just sitting there? A Dr I was seeing for my stomach problems last year told me once that when you have thyroid problems, you don't digest all of your food usually. So I don't know; like I said weird...but whatever!

Anyway so about that, whenever I throw up...I tend to gain weight which is even more bizarre. I weighed for whatever reason Saturday evening and it said 278 which was fine because I had been eating all day right? After I threw up I weighed 279.5...crazy. Anyway yesterday I ended up having my regular food treat and I had lasagna it was amazing! And I lost .5 lbs yesterday so I weighed 279 this morning. I have to be 275 by July 25th. So I'm kicking it up and pushing through! We'll see how the rest of this week goes :) Hope you all are well! Until next time ;-)

41.

2010-07-05T12:43:00.000-05:00

Happy Monday! Hope you all had a great 4th of July! My husband is out of town for the week and I'm so bummed :( Okay you guys are going to think I'm crazy but I totally forgot to weigh this morning! I had to rush to get ready to go to work then I had to say bye to the hubbs and when I got to work I was like DANGG! :( Sorry everyone! But I will say I had a little more than just my treat this weekend :( We'll see what happens. Also I have a guest coming in tomorrow so I don't know if I'll have much time to get on and blog! I'll try but no promises, so if you don't see anything this week I'll be back next week! Hope you all have a wonderful day! Until next time :)

40.

2010-07-02T13:58:00.000-05:00

HAPPY HAPPY FRIDAY! So excited, I get to see the Twilight: Eclipse movie tomorrow morning! Yay! alsoooo I DID IT! I weighed exactly 278.0 this morning! YEA!!! I have lost 44 pounds in about 2.5 months! I can't even believe it I'm SO excited! I only have 15 more pounds until I am done with phase 1 and another pound after that until I have lost 60 lbs and am posting my next round of pictures! Anyway I'm really excited and thanks for all the encouragement! I also lost 5 inches off my body this week! Woo hoo! I have someone coming to visit me on Tuesday night, and about a month ago when we were talking about my weight loss I said I bet I would be at 275 when she got here...so 3 lbs in 4 days with the weekend coming? Might happen might not...I for sure hope to be there by the time she leaves on Friday though. Let's see how this goes! Hope you all have a great weekend! Happy 4th of July and be safe! Until next time :)

39.

2010-06-30T15:19:00.000-05:00

It's the middle of the week and I am so ready for Saturday to get here! Okay okay I must admit...I love Twilight. There I said it, it's out there...if you are a hater that's fine haha. Anyway the third movie Eclipse came out this morning at 12:01 and I'm going to see it Saturday morning! EEE So excited haha. I posted links for the soundtrack, the book...and Stephenie Meyers newest book that is a part of Eclipse. If you want go buy them...it's a very intense Saga that you can't put down until it's done, and it has a wonderful love story in it :) Anyway! Back to other Thyroid Diet matters! So yesterday and Monday evening I was really sick...definitely was not able to work out, but I did this morning...so now today is Day 1 again...haha, let's see if I can make it through these 14 days on TTapp! Also, Monday morning I weighed 280.8 and I wanted to be at 278 by Friday. Well this morning when I weighed it said....279.4! I lost exactly half of what I wanted to lose this week and I'm in the 270s!!! AHHHH! I'm thrilled, and I hope I can still lose that extra 1.4 lbs by Friday!

Okay a lot of you have been asking me these questions: 1. "What supplements are you taking to help with your weight loss?" and 2. "What are you doing different that I'm not doing?" And here are your answers...1. I'm not taking any supplements for weight loss, in fact the only supplements I take are Evening Primrose Oil, which does nothing for weight loss...but it's supposed to help your hair grow back. 2. Obviously I can't see what you guys do every day, but here's what I'm doing...I stick to the diet like we're handcuffed together. And that's it. Also...I have a lot more weight to lose than most of you, so it's going to come off me faster than it is someone who needs to lose 50ish lbs. I'm very proud of all of you who are attempting to lose thyroid lbs, those who have lost weight, and whoever isn't even ready to begin this diet! You guys can do this, whenever you are ready to...and just keep swimming ;-) Until next time!

38.

2010-06-28T14:13:00.000-05:00

Happy Monday! Hope you all had a great weekend! Mine was pretty good, it was relaxing which was nice but at the same time I was gone almost the entire time haha! Okay so I guess last weekend must have been just a fluke cause I definitely didn't lose anything this weekend. I gained .8 lbs this weekend I weighed 280.8 this morning. I'm not excited about that obviously, but I'm not incredibly depressed by it either. I know I'll get it off this week (maybe even just today) I'm still planning on being in the 270s this week...I would LOVE to be 278 by Friday. I don't know if I'll get there...I just want to get as far away from 280 as possible just in case next weekend turns out like this last weekend!

I have to start TTapp all over again :( In the first 6 days I'm not supposed to miss any days at all...and I missed yesterday! I didn't even realize it until this morning I was so bummed! I'm just so used to not working out on the weekend it never crossed my mind. So today is day 1 yet again! But that's okay!

Also, I had my suspicions -and some of yours- confirmed this morning...I have gone back to hyperthyroidism. I have to take some more tests and I'm seeing my Endo in a little over 2 weeks so I'm sure my dose will get changed. I'm betting that's why I'm always having a period...and my arms have been super shaky lately so that explains that too! But now I can't help but wonder if that's why I'm losing at fast as I have been...I really hope not! I hope switching my dose doesn't slow my weight loss way down...or reverse it! AHH! Anyway I'll keep you all updated...I don't even know HOW hyper I am, the lady didn't have my TSH #s. Have a great Monday!! Until next time ;-)

37.

2010-06-25T12:06:00.000-05:00

Happy Friday everyone!!! I hope you are all excited for your weekends! So I didn't end up making my goal, I weighed in this morning at 280.0 I was very close! .1 lbs off but that's okay I'm still very excited, that's 4 lbs loss since last Friday! Yay!

I'm also doing TTapp as you know and man it is KILLER! My legs are shaking it's hillarious. Tomorrow will be day 4 which, I heard, is when it starts getting easier! I sure hope so because my arms are barely able to type this they're so sore haha.

I also lost 3.5 inches off my body this week! Yay! I'm really excited and I'm gonna keep on going! I'm hoping to be in the 270s at some point next week so let's see if I can do this! Have a great weekend! Until next time!

36.

2010-06-23T13:07:00.000-05:00

It's halfway through the work week! WOO! This week has been pretty good so far! On my post on Monday it said I was going to do the elliptical and TTapp, but then I read the instructions for TTapp and you're not supposed to do that. haha! So Monday night I worked out on the elliptical and last night I went over the instructions on TTapp and getting the positions right, this morning I started TTapp! It was killer! But for me it said I need to do this every day for 14 days, after that I have to do it for...4 weeks? now I can't remember how long...but anyway I need to do it every other day for however many weeks. Keep me in your prayers I know these next two weeks are going to be intense!

As for my weight....I weigh 280.4! Yay!!! I've lost 1.2 lbs since Monday and I'm super excited! I was nervous about this morning's weigh in because I couldn't stop eating last night! I was so hungry!!! I ate 2 salads, broccoli, and a little pudding cup that was I think 40 calories? (Mary Shomon said those, along with sugar free fudgesicles are good to have as a non-treat treat. So if you have cravings eat it and don't count it as your treat) Anyway I ate all of that last night and I was still hungry! As you can tell, I was worried about this morning but I still lost weight! So I was very excited! I still want to be in the 270s by Friday so let's hope I can lose at least .5 lbs by then! Hope you all are doing amazing! Until next time :)

35.

2010-06-21T14:23:00.000-05:00

Happy Monday! Back to another week let's hope this one flies by! Hope you all had great weekends, I sure did! My cousin had her baby on Saturday morning and it was so fun being there for that! That afternoon-evening my hubby and I went on our date -where I only ate what's allowed on my diet- Then we went to see Toy Story 3, it was soo cute! I had a little bit of popcorn, but I didn't have any starches yet that day so that's totally fine! After we went and got ice cream (my treat for the week) and watched the sun set...it was wonderful :) Sunday we just relaxed and then went to have dinner at his parent's for Father's Day. All in all good weekend!

SO Friday I weighed in at 284 and this morning I weighed............281.6!! Yay! I have lost 40.4 lbs in 2 months and 1 week! And I lost weight during a weekend for the first time since my first week of the diet! By this Friday I want to be in the 270s so let's hope I get there!

Also I talked about increasing my elliptical time this week, but I'm not going to! I got the TTapp DVD and I'm going to be doing that along with 15 minutes on the elliptical every day. We'll see how that goes! Hope you all have a wonderful day! Until next time :)